#May2014
Monday Morning Commute: Days of Present Apologies
Greetings, Earthlings! Martians! Transdimensional Omnigendered Omnisexual Multi-Dolphins! This is Monday Morning Commute. It’s currently Memorial Day here in the Empire, which means most of us are stuffed with hormone-soaked meats and oat sodas. But sadly the day shall pass, the long weekend shall end, and we will be (those of us fortunate enough to have the days off) staring into the Gaping Maw of the Work Week. This column is the various things I am looking forward to, to yank me through the shortened grind. Share your own dalliances, fools!
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‘WATCH DOGS’ Trailer: Hacking The Planet Like A 1337 Dude
New Watch Dogs trailer! has arrived, highlighting the various ways you’ll totally fucking hack the planet.
Troll pretends to be Ubisoft; CANCELS ‘WATCH DOGS’ trademark. Hardcore++
Oh man. This is some next level trolling ish right here. Some dude or dudette pretended to be Ubisoft, and at least temporarily/successfully filed to cancel their trademark for Watch Dogs. Shout out to this person before they’re assuredly ushered off to some communal CorporoGulag on the dark side of the Moon. Your penchant for destruction and anarchy is probably only going to be matched in size by your pain at the hand of robo-hounds and psychic ninjas.
‘WATCH DOGS’ delayed until SPRING 2014. SHITTIN’ ALL OVER MY LAUNCH DAY PLANS
Titty fuck a goose! Goddamn Watch Dogs. Goddamn UbiSoft. The game I was sweating in a sensual coupling with my launch day PS4 has been delayed. What’s next? What’s next!
‘WATCH DOGS’ E3 TRAILER LEAKS EARLY. The NSA is all like YEAH WE GOT THAT.
Watch Dogs is a pretty interesting game to be dropping at E3. You know, because this week the NSA was caught pants-down. “Ohhh yeah, we have sort of been collating all your data. Nice scat porn, Caff-Pow!” And then we all meekily contemplate how we live our digital lives. Anyways, here is the early trailer for Watch Dogs, a game I’ll be buying. Soon. For PS4.
What do you think of it?
Playstation 4 announced – My Orbis is tickled; is yours?
Sony has unveiled their next-generation platform at today’s much anticipated Playstation meeting event. You can guess the name they went with.
In a two-hour event live-streamed through every major media outlet, the new console, its UI, its core features and its first games were shown off to the world for the first time. Let’s get to all the meat unveiled today.
