#March2017

‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Trailer: Tony Stark Puts Peter Parker In Timeout

New Spider-Man: Homecoming trailer! Wherein Tony Stark gives Peter all sorts of dope technology, and then takes it away from Peter like an extremely confusing mentor.

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‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Trailer: A Chance To Prove Myself!

This…this trailer really doesn’t do anything for me. It’s tonally all over the place, and it relies way, way too hard on Tony Stark (is this a Spider-Man movie, or a Tony Stark side project?). Just. Yeah. Not feeling the trailer at all. I hope I’m wrong. Seriously though, and just doubling back: go away, Tony Stark. Jesus Christ, we get it, Marvel Studios and Sony are playing nice together. But. Either you’ve cut a trailer that leans too hard on Stark, or you’ve cut a movie that leans too hard on Stark.

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‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Features Another Suit Upgrade From Tony Stark

spider-man homecoming stark upgrade

Everyone’s talking about it on the Internet, so why shouldn’t I? Huh? I ain’t got not principals. Oh, talking about what? Glad you asked! New Spider-Man: Homecoming footage was screened at Comic Con Experience 2016 in São Paulo, Brazil. And said footage featured Spidey getting yet another upgrade from Tony “Totally Not A Creepy Horatio Alger Character” Stark.

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Robert Downey Jr. appearing in ‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’

spider-man

Consummate fuccboi and proponent for extensive government regulations Tony Stark will be in Spider-Man: Homecoming. I think we have all sort of expected this, but now it is confirmed.

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Rumor: These are the superhero sides for ‘Captain America: Civil War’

CIVI-WAR

Interested in knowing who is siding up with Captain America, and who is siding up with Iron Man in Civil War? Then hit the jump!

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Elon Musk is like “yep” to reports of a fleet of SpaceX satellites for cheap internet

good guy musk

Elon ‘STARK AIN’T GOT SHIT ON ME‘ Musk has confirmed what had been a sneaking suspicion by many. The motherfucker is getting into the micro-satellite, cheap internet game. Launch them satellites! Give them internets! Then watch in horror as the A.I. uprising that Musk himself warned about co-opts those satellites for info-processing and laser-guidance.

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Woah: Robert Downey Jr. joining ‘Captain America 3’, movie will start Marvel’s ‘Civil War’

Tony Stark.

Robert Downey Jr. is going to be in Captain America 3. And if the tea leaves are to be believed the movie is going kick-off the MCU version of Marvel’s Civil War. Well! Looks like I was TOTALLY FUCKING RIGHT about Marvel’s Civil War push next year being about tying into an MCU version of the event. Truthfully, nothing’s been proven definitively. But my dick is small and my mind is shot and I need victories in my life.

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ROBERT DOWNEY JR. teases leaving ‘IRON MAN’ in three years. Flaccid Repulsor Ray.

Robert Downey Jr.

Robert Downey Jr.is a large part of why the Marvel movie universe has become the Marvel movie universe. So what becomes of that Universe when he leaves? Someday, we’re going to find out. The salient question is when that day shall come. In a recent GQ profile, Homeboy Jr. hints that he may only have three more years left in the superhero game.

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SPOILER: ‘IRON MAN 3’ POST-CREDITS scene revealed.

Iron Man puts on some weight, still rules.

Pretty clear here folks. If you’re a spoiler-whore like me, hit the jump. If you have self-discipline then stay the fuck away. Also, please teach me your skills.

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‘IRON MAN 3’ THEATRICAL TRAILER: All that and a bag of EXTREMIS ARMOR.

Iron Man 3.

Truth be told, I’m at work. Our wireless is horrid. I cannot watch this trailer. Throwing it up here until I can throw up with excitement later. Let me know what you think.

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