#December2017
SNES Saturdays # 9 – Christmas Evening Corpulence
A little streaming from Christmas evening. Playing some Super Mario World, tackling a five-pound bag of watermelon Sour Patch Kids. There’s, uh, other stuff, but I’m blanking on it. Totally compelling description, right?
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SNES Saturdays #7 & 8 – Booty Had Me Like…Van Damme is God
We’re late! Getting these up! Always late…getting it up. I know, I know. Too easy. Too lame. Too puerile. Which makes it perfectly fitting for my dumb ass! But, here we go!
SNES Saturdays #6 – The Terrorist Known As Super Mario
Last weekend’s stream is up, my dudes. We spend the time talking about the terrorist known as Super Mario. Imagining the terror that would be getting blasted with diarrhea while eating ass, and other garbage. All the while hunting secret levels in Super Mario World.
SNES Saturdays #5 – Hail Brahquaman, Who Never Shot Blanks
LATEST stream is up. Join us as we talk about the terrifying sublimity that is ejaculating for the first time, thrash on the dumpster juice that is Justice League, and finally finish Donkey Kong Country.
SNES Classics are coming to Nintendo’s New 3DS
What the fuck are the New Nintendo 3DS, and 3DS XL? Like, in comparison the Old Nintendo 3DS? How many fucking iterations are there? But uh, anyways. The New Nintendo 3DS and 3Ds XXXL Pizza are getting SNES classics.
Which I’ll just keep playing on Bateman’s emulator, cause I don’t have a New or Old or Moderately Used 3DS.
Weekend Open Bar: We’re trying to plug a hole in the universe!
Ah! A toast to the Elder Ones for allowing me to make it to another Weekend. I am currently caught in some sort of time-displacement, shuffling between the expansion and contraction of Linear-ExistenSpace. Weeks that fly by, while feeling draining. Moments that drag on, while evaporating at impressive speeds. But that’s neither here nor there, for the next couple of days! It’s the Weekend! And with that comes the Open Bar.
Weekend Open Bar: All She Needed Was Some
Holy fucking shit hanging off the cliff-nipple of a monstrous, three-headed Minotaur with a taste for my ass but no respect for the dainty nature of a human being’s sphincter. Is there anything worse than the first fucking week back from a long weekend? The Minotaur and I answer declaratively: no. So thank goodness, it’s Friday. And this is the Weekend Open Bar.
Video: ‘Super Mario World’ Lowest Score Ever Run.
Fuck speed runs! Fuck high-score runs! This is the new-new black. Duder here scores the lowest score ever in Super Mario World, and of course he’s captured his impressive banality on the YouTube. It’s pretty intense.
Hit the jump for the video and the particulars.
New York City Gets Its Own Super Mario World Map. Animated Awesomeness.
Jesse Eisemann. Talented appreciator of the finer things in life. Like Super Mario World.
