Hey friends! It’s time for the Open Bar! The chance to hang out with the denizens of Space-Ship Omega throughout the weekend! In fact, it’s the only place and chance to hang out with (Bateman and) me this weekend! I know, I know. Will we ever stream again?

We will next weekend!

And the following week, we got a special stream on Thanksgiving! Seriously!

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It ’tis I, the booty hunter! You know me! The man who can stare at gifs of butts on Tumblr for hours, but is always late with Monday Morning Commute. Listen! Listen. Booty hunting is a complicated profession. But more than that, it is gloriously passive. Way easier to watch ’em giggle than to pen something. Even slop! Even slop such as this, I know.

But! The booty hunter has arrived, and I’ve got with me my weekly satchel of sacred distractions that are getting me through the week. And oh, fuck, do I hate the weeks lately. Dark as fuck. Cold as fuck. I want to bury myself in blankets and caloric excess and wait for Spring. But, I can’t yield just yet. I mean, we got a significant amount of fucking months to go, and I can’t throw in the towel.

So this here is Monday Morning Commute! And the forthcoming are what I’m enjoying or looking forward to this week! I hope you’ll share your own satchel of sacred distractions in the comments section!

I must admit, I’m going to be quick! Dinner is on the way, and The Mandalorian awaits me. If I can punch this out prior to Mr. Door Dash arriving, I’ll be ecstatic.

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Greetings, fellow travelers upon the Space-Ship Omega! It’s I, your depraved and debauched captain. Walking around, wearing only boxer briefs and a compromised smile! How are you? Me? I’m doing decent enough. Pausing for a moment, taking a good goddamn breath. It’s hard to believe July is almost over. But, it’s also not that hard. My word, what a fucking busy month. Went to a funeral, taught two classes, went to Denver, ate too much. However, I’m done! Done teaching, at least until September.

Thus, I’m stoked to spend this time reconnecting with you all. Here on the blog! Hopefully this weekend, on Twitch!

What are you up to this week? Playing anything? Watching anything? What measures are you taking to stay cool, as the Earth melts and hope evaporates? I wanna know!

I’ll go first.

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