New TV spot for The Last Jedi! I haven’t watched it, ain’t gonna watch it, but if you’re inclined…watch it!

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Star Wars live-action TV series coming to Disney’s streaming service. And this, friends, is why the lord created torrenting.

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Holy fuck, friends. Not only are the UberCzars at Lucasfilm happy with Rian Johnson, they’re apparently really happy. How do we know this? Well, they’ve given him the opportunity to develop his own new Star Wars trilogy. Like, outside the Skywalker Saga. His own thing. As someone who has bitched about Lucasfilm just regurgitating the Greatest Hits, I can’t help but be torqued by this news. Finally, something new coming down the pipe.

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The Last Jedi is going to make a zillion dollars. No one is going to be convinced either way at this point. So, what does Disney do? Naturally, they drop a TV spot that gives away a rather poignant moment. Which is why I’m not watching it, no way, fuck nah.

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It’s just STAR WARS. STAR WARS and their adventures, STAR WARS, forever and forever, a hundred years STAR WARS.. things. KATHLEEN KENNEDY and STAR WARS runnin’ around and STAR WARS time. Aaall day long forever. All, a hundred days STAR WARS forever a hundred times. Over and over STAR WARS adventures dot com W W W dot STAR WARS dot com W W W STAR WARSy adventures all hundred years. Every minute STAR WARS dot com W W W hundred times STAR WARS dot com.

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Fucking Electronic Arts, dude. They’ve shuttered Visceral Games, the minds behind Dead Space, who were until recently working on a Star Wars game. Not only that, but the project was being shepherded by Amy Hennig, who made her reputation on the fucking Uncharted franchise.

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Since the parting of its initial directors, I’ve regarded the Han Solo movie as an inoffensive fart done in a quiet room. At best, maybe an adequate, forgettable dish of vanilla ice cream. Well, said fart-ice cream has wrapped production finally, with a fart-ice cream title to match.

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Man. If you only knew how much time I burned through looking for a header image for this post. If you only knew how much time I burned through trying to come up with a title for this post. But here I am, folks. Opening up the Weekend Open Bar for one and all.

Now. I’m covered in sweat, lowered in the couch, delayed in showering before this evening’s activities.

Later. I’ll be covering myself in crumbs, lowering myself in the couch, consuming media with Bateman.

You. What are you doing tonight? Saturday? This weekend? What are you playing? Eating? Watching? Reading? Contemplating?

Somehow. It’s time for yet another Weekend Open Bar.

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It’s the final trailer for Star Wars: The Last Jedi, what the fuck else do you need to know? Watch it! Then come back!

Are you back? Nice! Impressions? What did you think?

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Lots of Episode IX news lately. Jurassic World guy was fired. J.J. Abrams was brought in to both write *and* direct. Now, the aforementioned film has been delayed six months. This makes sense since, you know, I imagine Abrams is starting from scratch on the script. I don’t really have a problem with this, despite my horrid moaning about Abrams taking over. Frankly, I don’t want any of Jurassic World guy’s script. Not only that, though, but I enjoy Star Wars movies as a Christmas treat.

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