Oh word? Say it ain’t obviously so? Remember last month when I posted an article with the elegant title, No Sh*t Rumor: Obi-Wan getting standalone ‘Star Wars’ flick? Well here’s the sequel. Double No Sh*t. Hopefully surprising no one, it turns out that Old Ben will be getting more than one movie.

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Cliff Chiang produced a gorgeous poster back in the day. Before Star Wars Lived Again. Now said poster is being employed around STAR WARS FILMING CENTRAL HUB to remind motherfuckers to stop leaking EVERY GODDAMN THING.

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Truth be told, this podcast was a long time coming. And I ain’t sure it even should have come. You see a couple of months ago Rendar found himself a beautiful OMNI-DIMENSIONAL babe upon the silicate dunes of Io. Packed up his stuff, took the boarding shuttle down to her hut, and ain’t been seen since. We get glorious missives from him every once in a while — he’s happy. Kid on the way, arthritis salved by the regenerative sand-leeches he found down by the Cloaked Bay. But the drawback is that we couldn’t cut a podcast. Eventually we decided to record one without him – heresy I know – and pray he’d return before we dared record a follow-up.

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Yesterday the valves on the S.S. Star Wars once again leaked concept art deep into the sea of pop culture. Quickly dispersing potential concept art featuring both new stormtrooper designs and a potential lightsaber duel across the Inter-Nets. I mean we sort of figured there would be a lightsaber duel in a Star Wars movie, but the art is all sorts of spoilerish. So if you’re a Spoiler Slut like me, check out the goodies post-break.

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In what is apparently a *rumor*, but what strikes me as *no fucking shit*, there’s murmurings that Obi-Wan is getting his own standalone movie. Like, this is obvious, right?

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I don’t know why, but I’m just going to call him Jar Jar Abrams until he proves himself otherwise. Do I think he will? YES. Is that going to get in the way of me calling him such until the first trailer comes out and BLOWS OFF MY TITS? NO. Said Jar Jar has added one of his total BFFs to the cast of Episode VII.

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If you watch Game of Thrones and you weren’t totally swooning over Syrio Forel — stop fucking lying. J.J. Abrams seems intent on stacking the cast for Episode VII with a bevy of my bitties. And the latest to join the cast is Miltos Yerolemou, who plays the aforementioned awesome swordsman.

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Bummed out about Disney ripping the Star Wars comics license out of the hands of Dark Horse? Well. Yeah, I don’t see how this news will make it any better. Not only has Marvel (perhaps understandably) been given the Star Wars license, but they will also be reprinting the older Dark Horse comics. Starting next April! Which I suppose also makes sense? Man, I wish I *got* things.

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I promised myself I wouldn’t fucking tease release dates in headlines anymore, but Star Wars Rebels is a bit more complicated than usual. It’s debuting across a fucking application,  a website, and a TV station. All on different dates! So sorry, yo. Ain’t like the extra click is getting me any money. (Ain’t like anything is getting me any money.)

But deets and a pretty awesome Star Wars: Rebels short after the break.

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Last weekend at Boston Comic Con, Bateman and myself spent a good amount of time lamenting that there doesn’t exist an unaltered cut of Star Wars. And now it seems (if this website isn’t a big fucking LIAR) that the sensible will become the inevitable. Disney is planning to release an unaltered cut. Praise be. Praise be!

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