#October2011
Monday Morning Commute: Then Our Sweatpants Boners Swung.
Monday evening in the Northeast section of the American Empire proper. Cold winds, comfortable clothes. Shut windows and caffeine in the veins. I’m relaxing. I’m also Caffeine Powered, my (literal) brother Rendar Frankenstein tagging me in for this iteration. I’m swinging over the top fucking rope, ready to drop sweet chin music upon all your unsuspecting asses. Gape for me baby, and allow my Love Heel to caress your Soul-Clit.
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Space Lasers To Destroy Orbital Debris? Future Rules!
Let’s ignore the fact that us Bovine people of the Earth have managed to actually begin cluttering up fucking space with bullshit. Christ almighty. Instead let’s dwell on the awesomeness that is the potential for space lasers to blow this space crap to smithereens. Sort of. Kinda.
Waterfall Nebula Is Cascading Cosmic Bliss.
Fear Fest: Space Disasters! Quiet, No One Can Hear You Scream.
OCTOBER 23rd, Space Travel Disasters
“Well, the thing about a black hole – its main distinguishing feature – is it’s black. And the thing about space, the colour of space, your basic space colour, is black. So how are you supposed to see them.”
-Holly (Red Dwarf)
I love the idea of space travel, I really do. However, when I think of everything that can go wrong it scares the shit out of me. I understand we’ve had about 100 years of flight under our belts now but that still does nothing for my nerves. We don’t have junk floating around in the sky that could cause a collision … unless you count Southwest. Southwest fucking sucks. I’ve flown with them twice and both times they’ve fucked me or someone in my party. But before I get too far off topic, space travel has its fair share of dangers.
Sad Failed Star Is The Coldest Object Every Photographed. Like, Really Cold.
I can’t blame you if you associate stars with burning hot churning pinnacles of oblivion. However, sometimes they’re fucking cold. Like really cold. WD 0806-661 B is a brown star that may be colder than the human body.
Virgin Has Opened The First Commercial Spaceport. Mars, I Come To Thee!
Richard Branson has opened the first commercial fucking spaceport in the solar system. Galaxy? Maybe. Universe? Of course not! They probe me and laugh! Oh, they laugh. No seriously though, this is pretty fucking sweet.
Comets Almost Ended Life On August 12th, 1883. Time Traveling Morgan Freeman Saved Us.
According to new findings, a wild gang of Earth-fucking comets almost ended life on our Fair Blue Marble. There was no Bruce Willis to stave disaster, but rather chance. Or the Hand of Zeus, if you swing that way.
Scientists Working On Tractor Beam To Save Astronauts Floating Away. Awesome.
My main concern when I’m outside my spaceship harvesting tilium is the threat of solar radiation. However, I’m also pretty worried that I’m going to float the fuck away. Freeze to death in the horrors of deep space. Scientists got my back though. They’re working on something to save my dumb floating away ass.
Galactic Trance! Stare Into The Eyes of NGC 2467, Feel The Nausea.
(Click image to enlarge)
Stare deeply into the eyes of NGC 2467. Stare into them and feel the universal glory, the nausea of existing in such a realm! It beckons you to understand. But you cannot. I cannot. We are mud-men-ape-brains.
Needle Galaxy Gets Tilted, Rough Weekend Mucho Galactic Crunk.
(Click image to enlarge)
…what am I saying? You type so many headlines and all of a sudden everything/nothing starts making sense to you. Anyways! Check out the fucking Needle Galaxy, as viewed from Earth. Son of a bitch apparently kicks it like Bernie on the weekends.
Or something.
