#June2015
Cassini captures Saturn’s Warped D (Ring)
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NASA: We’re going to Europa, hunting for futzin’ alien life
Today was the first day of development for NASA’s mission to get us to Europa. Where we will find life. Giant, multi-tittied omnisexual telepathic beings, who will have no time for us monkeys and our cruelties.
Hubble gives us a look at the densest part of the Milky Way
Space is big! And mostly void! But here Hubble is giving us a glimpse into the densest, most dank point in the Milky Way Galaxy. The Arches Cluster.
Space Swoon! Europa’s Jupiter-Facing Hemisphere is ready for its close-up
I say goddamn! This is a glorious mosaic of Europa’s Jupiter-facing dome piece.
NASA “successfully” tests “physics-defying” EM drive
Thanks to our own The Dude for sharing this! I meant to talk about it earlier, but you know, busy fucking life. Apparently NASA ASTRO-WIZARDS have successfully tested a “physics-defying” EM drive. Which, ideally, means I’ll be fucking sun-tanning on Mars on my one-year wedding anniversary next year. I’m reading this news right, right?
NASA: Mars was once totally home to a giant friggin’ ocean
NASA loves teasing us with news of how our Red Brother used to be. The Astronomical Gurus have revealed that Ares once had an ocean that may have covered nearly half of its northern hemisphere.
Alien Star cut through our Solar System some 70,000 years ago
Feeling pretty fucking safe, ain’t you. But you shouldn’t, you fucks. You can be sitting around, and little do you know, alien stars are whizzing through the Oort Cloud.
Mars has bizarre plumes that scientists can’t explain. IT AWAKENS.
Oh, we have done it now. All our fucking around on Mars has awoken It. And it’s beginning to vent its Hate-Force, before rising up out of the Martian sands.
The Mouth of the Beast Nebula is metal as f**k
Well, we officially have the coolest fucking name for a nebula. Ever. Into the Mouth of the Beast! Slide down its gullet! Into the Heart of the Gloom stellar factory.
Elon Musk wants to build the Internet for space
Elon Musk ain’t just launching satellites into space to cloak the Blue Marble in the Internet. Motherfucker is thinking larger. Like building the goddamn space Internet. For Mars. And probably Europa.
