Eat gator! Jerk off in the woods!  Sweat too much, smell too awfully. Enjoy nature! Curse how it makes your balls smell. Am I talking about my trip to Denver last month? Or am I talking about Red Dead Redemption 2? Why not both, you son of a bitch! Yadda yadda, blah blah. How the fuck are you folks doing? Me? I’m doing a-okay. Sleep late, masturbate. Two of the pillars of my current summer vacation. Life ain’t bad.

I mean, if you can ignore the Arctic melting, and the rise of fascism. But, I have faith you can. Us rot-mouth flesh-bellies have tremendous power to deny forthcoming doom. I imagine that prowess stems from our incessant need to deny our own mortality, and works its way into shuttering our eyes at the very-not-good situation on this planet.

Anyways! Holy fuck, what’s up? Glaze your tits, gaze your eyes, and join me here at Monday Morning Commute.

The impending mortality? The horrors of modern culture?

Why, gloss them over with some distractions. And, share your particular distractions this week!

I’ll go first, fellow meat-bags.

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