#September2013
Monday Morning Commute: NEURAL STEW for the SYNAPSE BURN
…hello there, friends. Caffeine Powered at your service. I do not say leisure, for I am a busy’d man these days. It is a Sunday Evening whilst I type this, it will be a Monday Morning on the Eastern Seaboard of the Theoretically United States when this is published. As I tippy-type, I race the literal clock. How can I share with you what I am going to be enjoying in this next week (as per the nature of Monday Morning Commute), while still finishing before Breaking Bad begins? Easy. By doing what I always do. By typing with stunning alacrity, nauseating disregard for grammatical form, and an utter disregard for proof-reading.
Let’s do this, you turkeys.
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‘HER’ TRAILER: Spike Jonze’s Lovable Operating System
Didn’t even know about this odd, quirky, totally right up my indie sensibilities (that I rigorously deny). I look forward to probably blowing snot bubbles.
SCARLETT JOHANSSON to star in new LUC BESSON flick. I can’t even.
Scarlett Johansson, she who inspires the fires of my loins. Luc Besson, he who makes really awesome, awful, and entertaining action flicks. These two will be paired in eternity. Or at least for a movie.
‘CAPTAIN AMERICA 2’ SET PHOTOS: He got that SUPER SUIT, and BLACK WIDOW is back. Latex yumyum.
Here are some grainy as fuck set photos from Cap 2: Winter is Coming, and So Is Bucky. They offer a glimpse and confirmation of Rogers’ new suit, plus a look at Black Widow back in the hood. This is great news for me, my latex fetish, and horrible news for all the socks in my underwear drawer. Get it? I’m going to jack off to these pics. So low-resolution. So naughty…I know, I’m a piece of shit.
‘CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER” testing five females for lead. Plus! Black Widow.
I know this news article should be about how the people behind Captain America: Unthaw Bucky and Let Him Fuck Stuff Up are coming close to casting the female lead. I know it. On an intellectual level. But all I want to do is talk about how excited I am that I’m going to get to rub at my jeans while Black Widow prances across the screen during the flick. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m not.
Cosplay: This BLACK WIDOW Ain’t Scarlett Johansson, But She Is A Bust. Puns. Puns Ahoy.
It’s Friday. Friday! Short week, and now its ending. So no one, no one will blame you for retiring to the rest room for a few moments after viewing this wondrous Black Widow cosplay. You earned it, folks. You earned it.
Joss Whedon Would Like More Females In ‘AVENGERS 2’, Moi Aussi!
One of Joss Whedon’s calling cards is his ability to write some powerful ladies. However no matter the success of Avengers, its lovely husk was filled with only one female lead. This is an occurrence our Lord Whedon would want to address in the sequel.
‘THE AVENGERS’ In High School Were Mulleted Studs.
Here’s a shot making the rounds. All your favorite Avengers as they looked back in their high school days. These are totally senior head shots, right? ‘Cause I’m staring at you Chris Hem…I mean ScarJo. Staring.
The Avengers: You’re Going to See It. Now You’re Here to Understand Why You’re Going to See It.
The Avengers should be as necessary to you this weekend as breathing, if:
– You saw and enjoyed the Marvel Universe films of the past five years — like Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America.
– You read and enjoy superhero comic books.
– You have a fucking pulse.
If two of these things apply, you’ve probably already seen it. If all three do, you saw it last night at midnight like the rest of us.
NEW ‘AVENGERS’ TRAILER Is All About Black Widow. I Approve.
Here’s an Avengers trailer rocketing out of Poland that goes superhard on the Black Widow action. I may be losing my mind, but some of the footage looks like its from Iron Man 2, unless Natasha spends a lot of her time running around nondescript white hallways. None the less, I’ll take it.
