#July2020
KFC is working with a Russian 3D bioprinting lab to develop first lab-made chicken nuggets. Let’s go ‘Blade Runner’ baby!
KFC and a Russian 3D bioprinting lab are working hard, friends. To do what? Bring the world the first lab-made chicken nuggets. Fucking awesome. Sign me up! I mean, don’t you dare protest. What they’re already made of? Far, far worse shit.
Russia is planning to 3D print a Moon base. How very fucking futuristic of ya’ll, I dig it.
…or is 3D printing futuristic anymore? It feels that way, but it’s also sort of commonplace? Anyways, either way. Russia is planning on printing a 3D Moon base. And, I fuck with this heavy.
Russia planning to build a Lunar Base by the 2030s; Cosmonauts Get!
Fuck yeah! It’s about time someone began planning to build some gnarly structures on the Moon. Do you hear that, United States? There are people aiming to get back to the Moon! Take the bait! Begin making your own Lunar Base plans! Let’s get the SpaceBasedArmRace going again. Please!
GREAT YURI’S GHOST: RUSSIA announces new $50 BILLION space program.
Russia isn’t fucking around, folks. They’re dead set on establishing their Nuclear-Powered Illuminati hub on the surface of Europa. The Kremlin has recently unveiled the plan through which they shall engage such plans, covering up their obvious covert operations underneath the guise of a pretty, pretty, pretty beefy new space program.
RUSSIA’S internet-filtering law goes into effect today. HELLO future police state!
I know that probably everyone is peeping in on everyone else’s internet dongs when it comes to the government. I get it. At least there is typically the semblance of privacy. Russia ain’t feeling that though, yo! Their internet-filtering law goes into effect today, and it is pretty much geared for impressively rampant surveillance.
Russians admit to have having TRILLIONS of carats of diamonds hidden in asteroid crater. Reality, man.
Only in reality can such nonsense come true. Although, granted, if you believe in the Multiverse then everything is in fact reality. Whatever. A trifling detail.
Russia Planning On Builidng PERMANENT MOON BASE; My Space Heart Swells
The Cold War is heating up again! Russia is going full Bond, revealing their intentions of building a permanent base. ‘Cept I don’t really care that its Russia, cause at least someone is planning it. ‘Cept I don’t think they’d tell anyone if they were building something nefarious. Or would they? Plot! Thickens!
Vladimir Putin: Russian Has Microwave Mind Control Zombie Gun. Oh Vladdy
Vladimir Putin isn’t fucking around. You can tell that the Lord Emperor of Russian (and tiger kung-fu dominator) takes the USSR’s loss of the Cold War with a particularly chaffed ass. That leads him to dropping little nougats every once in a while about Russian rockitude. Take for example, the microwave zombie gun.
Video: Russian ‘Burger King’ Hip Hop Madness.
A minute-something Burger King ad from Russia featuring absurd imagery and hip hop. I have a feeling if I understood Russia it would only make a bit more sense. I am in love.