#April2015

Hulu paid $180 million for every episode of Seinfeld

Seinfeld.

Hulu is banking on you, like, really wanting to watch Seinfeld.

Read the rest of this entry »

Space Swoon: Behold the Frosty Slopes of Mars

Frosty Slopes!

Check it out, bruh! And bruhdette! It’s the fucking frosted slopes of Mars. Yeah, man. Totally wizard rager time at the ski slopes on the Red Planet! Winter break! Winter break a leg rushing to the local Space-Port, and book your ticket to the dopest ski resort in the solar system. OhwhatthefuckamIsaying? Let NASA explain it better.

Read the rest of this entry »

Weekend Open Bar: Of course…But maybe!

of course but maybe

Hello, friends. The heat is on, the sky is dark. My belly is full of queso and contentment. It’s the weekend. Let’s all gather here at theOpen Bar and shoot the shit for the next couple of days. ‘Cause if you can suck wind, suck down bandwidth, and take the time to join in this weekly commune…things could be worse. Maybe better? Sure. But maybe worse? Definitely.

Read the rest of this entry »

Crazy Aquaman rumor for ‘Batman v. Superman’

Aquaman

Let’s talk Batman v. Superman rumors! Yeah why the fuck not! It’s Monday night! I’m sitting in shorts, my Padmé Amidala baby doll, and my comfy crocs. Ain’t got nowhere to go. Ain’t got nothing better to do. The latest rumor involves newly christened OL Babe Khal Drogo (ever since the great booth flyby of 2014) and his role as Aquaman.

Read the rest of this entry »

R.L. Stine writing new ‘Fear Street’ books; 12 year-old me fist-pumps

Fear Street.

Sure we all loved Goosebumps, but it was R.L. Stine’s “more mature” book series Fear Street that gave me some of my earliest adolescent shocks, and boners. Now it appears that Stine is bringing the series back. Here’s to more shivers, shocks, boners, and funny feelings!

Read the rest of this entry »

‘Agents of SHIELD’ Season 2 debuting September 23

Agents of SHIELD

Did you give up on Agents of SHIELD last season? If so — I don’t blame you. However — it got pretty stinkin’ good right about the time of the Winter Soldier crossover. So I say goddamn!, I’m sweating the second season. A season which now has a debut date. And if you gave up on the show, I’m urging you. Give it a second chance. I promise it’s deec.

Read the rest of this entry »

‘PACIFIC RIM 2’ HAPPENING in 2017. Plus! Animated Series.

Mako!

I really enjoyed Pacific Rim. I never thought the movie would receive a genuine sequel, instead having a new installment banished to Endless Wind Cycle of Speculation. Well – I’m wrong again

Read the rest of this entry »

Rumor: REMASTERED ‘HALO’ COLLECTION dropping on XB1 THIS YEAR

Halo 4

HEY KIDS! Bummed out that Halo 5: Guardians of the Galaxy ain’t dropping until 2015? Me too! Are you also a consumerist whore like me, who will buy visually improved editions of games you already own? THEN I MAY HAVE A FUCKING SALVE FOR YOU.

Read the rest of this entry »

Solo ‘HULK’ movie following ‘AVENGERS 2’ says Lou Ferrigno

The Hulk all be questioning and such.

If the former body and current voice of the Hulk is to be believed, the Irradiated Fucker is soon going to be privileged enough to have his own flick. More than one person on the interwebs has already questioned just how tuned in Lou Ferrigno is to Marvel Movie News, but let’s indulge the rumor anyways.

Read the rest of this entry »

University lab technician drunkenly parties with monkeys, gets arrested. Damn the man.

If you can’t get a little buzzed, strip off your clothes, and party with the monkeys, what is the point of being a lab technician? I don’t see the point.

Read the rest of this entry »