#October2017

The creators of ‘Titanfall’ and Oculus have teamed-up for a super secret VR game I won’t care about

respawn titanfall oculus vr game

You know in Mean Girls when that one character is upbraiding the other character (imdb.com, search, Mean Girls, naw, too much effort) about attempting to make “Fetch” happen? Yeah, that is sort of my attitude towards VR gaming. Can we just stop trying to make people care? No? It’s going to happen anyways? Gotcha. Then, uh, okay. Hey! Neat! Respawn is teaming-up with Oculus to make a VR game!

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Oculus reportedly planning to drop $200 standalone wireless headset in 2018

oculus standalone headset 2018

This seems significant, yo. Oculus is planning on dropping a relatively cheap fucking wireless standalone headset next year. Gone are the wires, gone is the need for a computer.

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Oculus Lawsuit Ends With ZeniMax Being Awarded $500 Million. That’s A Lot of Junior Bacons

oculus lawsuit zenimax awarded half billion

The lawsuit between Oculus and ZeniMax has reached (a first) conclusion, with the latter being awarded $500 million. That’s, that’s a lot of Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers, man. But don’t buy them burgers yet, ZeniMax. At least not with the court ordered money. ‘Cause I imagine this case is going to be appealed, and then appealed again, so on, and so forth. Forever.

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Oculus no longer blocking Vive headset from playing Rift-exclusive titles

the war is over folksz

A tech war I did not know was being waged has come to an end. Vive owners will now be able to play Rift-exclusive titles on their headset. Which, I sort of imagine, benefits both companies.*

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‘Oculus Rift’ costs $600, will begin shipping March 28

Oculus-Rift. (1)

Phew! I was worried I was going to impulse buy an Oculus Rift. Would have really cheesed off my wife, and probably not been used very much. Well! The price for the rig has been revealed to be $600, which makes it even too rich for my economically irresponsible ass (for the moment).

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Final ‘Oculus Rift’ Requirements: “$800” Gaming PC for full experience

Oculus has revealed the requirements for their Oculus Rift, and according to Gizmodo it’s an “$800 PC.” First off, I suppose that’s not that bad. I mean, can you put a price on haptic-suit transhuman cyber sex? And second off, who knows how much all of the junk required for the rig will run when the Rift actually drops.

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Aiight: Oculus building its own VR motion controllers.

Oculus Rift.

I am not a smart man. So I didn’t really know if anyone else was stupefied by how Oculus and other VR Overlords were going to go about controlling their virtual realms. As a champion of teledildonics and shit, I was picturing some sort of fetishistic, haptic-feedback body suit. But I suppose motion controllers are cool too. (I guess.)

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OCULUS Buys Design Team Behind Kinect and 360 Controller. Gotta buy em all!

Oculus Rift.

THE OCULUS JUGGERNAUT SHALL NOT BE BOWED BY MORTAL OR DEITY. The company is acquiring talent like a motherfucker, and now they’re starting to snag up companies. The VR Headset That Shall Be has acquired the team that designed the Xbox 360 controller and the original Kinect. Kinect can get fucked and all that, but I’ll be goddamned if I wasn’t madly in love with the 360’s pad.

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‘Bastion’ & ‘Transistor’ senior programmer joins OCULUS.

Transistor.

All Hail The Oculus Brain Drain of 2014. The company that Better Bring Me The Metaverse is continuing to snag up talent from motherfuckers all over the gaming landscape. The latest brain-piece to be vacuumed up into their Monolithic Corpus is the senior programmer behind Bastion and Transistor.

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Friendship: OCULUS helping SAMSUNG on their VR Headset

Oculus Rift.

Corporate friendship! More like “mutually assured market dominance!”, but let me think of rainbows. Rainbows firing straight up my ass, rocketing out my cock in an ejaculation-prism that wows everyone in the football stadium. Wait — where were we? Oh! Samsung and Oculus totally jerking off one another in the VR market.

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