#March2012
Comics We’re Buying This Week: The Prophets Speak Of Infinite Boners
…Man, I fucking hate coming up with headlines sometimes. Funny books drop today, and we as comic book hounds zig and zag our asses to the Comic Farm to snag that which interests us. This column right here is intended to serve as the watering hole where we all share the wares we snagged. I can’t do this alone, people. What are you buying this week?
Not sure what’s dropping? Hit up ComicList.
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Comics We’re Buying This Week: Holy Sh*t, A Paul Pope Sighting!
The name is the game! Welcome to Comics We’re Buying This Week, the communal comic book welcome wagon where we all share the hotness we’re snagging from the funny book farm on a given Wednesday. Per usual: my taste is shite, and I’m always looking to broaden my horizons. Don’t know what’s dropping? Behold ComicList.
Comics We’re Buying This F**king Week: Massive Wood and Brubaker’s College Fund.
Welcome to the newly minted (and perhaps not staying named as such) Comics We’re Buying This F**king Week. Figured I’d cut the bullshit. Herein us guys and gals of the sequential funny book time can share the comic books we’re digging on in a given week. It’s a pretty exciting week, as I’m getting a new dose of Wood to engulf. Always a sucker for the Wood. (And infantile puns. It’s been a long day, forgive me.)
Dig the releases for yourself at ComicList.
Variant Covers: Ignite The Brandon Graham 2K12 Mindwarp!
Variant Covers. This is the venue for me to wank to the comic books dropping in a particular week that I’m interested in. It’s generally capes heavy, because when I was younger I myself was heavy. As always, you folk are encouraged to share the shit you’re checking out this week. Peep the deets at ComicsList. It’s show and tell without the creepy Uncle and lollipops. Bummer about the lollipops, agreed.
Variant Covers: It Ain’t Wrong If The Vegetable Loves You Back.
There are comic books coming out tomorrow, which can mean only one thing. Actually, it can mean a lot of things. The you factor into the geek wet dream of a Multiverse and it can mean…literally an infinite amount of things. One!, one of the things it means is that I’m here. In front of Microsoft Word. I am charged with bringing you the list of comic books I’m looking forward to this fine Wednesday. It’s a small charge, one I am capable of answering. My fat brain is filled with too many capes, not enough indies. A smattering of quasi-smaller publishings by actually relatively large companies like Image and Dark Horse.
Whatever the case, whatever the case. My taste is poor, I’m sure yours is better. So when I’m done mash-mash-mashing away on the keyboard and you have engaged in ultimate altruism and answered the bell by reading this mess, I implore you: share the comics you’re buying this week. Share them right up.
Variant Covers: Alan Moore’s Beard Is Your God Now.
There’s! There’s! There’s comic books dropping this week. As per every week, lest the Good Lords strike me dead. I can’t fathom living in a world without the weekly comic book shuffle. Snag the rags, dissect the diegesis and party until my pants come off. This is Variant Covers, the column where I blather about the funny books dropping this week that are keeping my sanity afloat.
Variant Covers: Reality Is A Special Effect!
Variant Covers. Column giving the rundown of the week’s comic releases. Trite, super-personal and irreverent. Share your finds, friends.
I’ve been sick lately. For the past five days my life has consisted of scraping the existential paste out of bed, nodding somewhat coherently as I teach, and napping. Fitful, sweaty naps. The sort of naps that could fill a Gatorade bottle and whose flopping fiction could power a small town.
I have not slept. I cannot breath. I am here though. When there’s a dance you have to show up. Do your courtesies and press your fleshes.
Variant Covers: Scalps, Stretchy Junk, and Futurists.
It’s that mid-summer moment where the comic books are twisting in my greasy palms, affronted by humidity and my general toxicity. Comic books! One of the great stalwarts of summers, the MEGA-EVENTS coming out weekly. Say what you will about the general quality of the EXPLODEY TIME STORY ARCS that permeate the shelves during the summer, I’ve come to need them just as a means of passing time. Like marking days off a calendar, they’re there. And they’re omnipresent. Keeping me company.
Like the drunk Uncle at the Christmas parties who you thinks annoys you, but then when he dies in a horror shit-show of cirrhosis and bloody vomiting, you miss him under the mistletoe. Trying to kiss your Mom, his first cousin.
I don’t know what I’m writing about anymore. This is Variant Covers, your weekly take on the tasty licks hitting comic books shelves.
Variant Covers: Only Assholes Think Superheroes Really Die.
As I type this, I’m sipping some cold suds. Non-alcoholic mind you, it’s a work night. Birdies blather from green trees outside the window, and I perspire from the warm Summer air. It’s a bit of a pleasant time to be inhabiting Spaceship Earth, alongside the Eastern seaboard of the Northern Americas. Life is good. To compliment all of that, the installment of this week’s funny books drops tomorrow.
Here’s what I find interesting hittin’ shelves.
Let me know what you’re feigning for.
Variant Covers: All That And A Bag Of Ennui!
And then there was ennui! Welcome to Variant Covers, the column that has me blathering about the comic books I’m picking up this week. There are occasions when the week is stacked to the brim with releases I’m sweating, and then there are weeks like this: a barren wasteland of interest.
Disagree with me? Hit the comments box with what you’re checking out. I’m curious, curious for you.
