#August2013
NASA’S CURIOSITY ROVER is now DRIVING ITSELF ON MARS. Skynet cackles.
Oh yeah this is totally cool. To-ta-lly. That little fucking robot on Mars is no longer doing our bidding, finally switching over to its autonomous navigation. This is all cute and shit until it builds its first colony of nanobot assassins.
NO WAIT — VOYAGER 1 left our SOLAR SYSTEM LAST YEAR. LOLWUT.
I have to enjoy small victories in life. Like when I watch people far, far, far more intelligent than me trip all over themselves. Take for instance: those Astronomical Wizards who keep trying to figure out if Voyager 1 has left our solar system.
NASA abandons repair plans for KEPLER TELESCOPE. Goodnight, Sweet Prince.
After finding roughly three-fucking-zillion exoplanets, it appears that the Kepler telescope is no longer going to hunt for the little balls of hope out there in the cosmos. It was a good goddamn run. But it needs repairs to maintain its accuracy, and NASA says they probably wouldn’t take.
Watch: DEPARTING EARTH as seen by NASA’S MESSENGER
Swoon! So this is what it will look like when I finally finish building my Rocket Ship. It’s taking a bit longer than expected. Do you know how many Diet Mountain Dew cans it takes to build a functioning hull? I don’t either, which is why I’m probably going to be vaporized. Eh, whatever! If I succeed, I’ll gather a glimmer that looks much like this.
White House says NASA’S NEXT BIG MISSION is capturing an asteroid. Aiiiiiiight.
Watch out, asteroids. Your days of romping about the space neighborhood with unfettered access shall soon be over. Uncle Sam is aiming NASA at its next goal, and it is to capture an asteroid. It ain’t exactly Mars, but….I don’t know. Yay?
NASA Reveals The ORION SPACE CAPSULE. The Sumbitch May Take Us To Mars
NASA has pulled the tarp away covering their new passenger-powered space shuttle thingy sumbitch. Meet the Orion Space Capsule.
NASA: VOYAGER 1 Has Almost Left Our Solar System. Hell Yeah.
Voyager 1 has been working its way out of our solar system for a long, long, long goddamn time. If calculations by astronomical wizards are correct, it is pretty much there.
NASA Develops Vacuum Tube Prototype for SPACE COMPUTERS. Rad Res++
Something I’ve never really thought of: how computers would stand up to the unkind blasts of radiation in space. Thankfully there are smarter people out there, who can think of space without inevitably diverging into “like, we’re all from the Big Bang, mannn” like me.