#February2014
‘AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON’ SNEAK PEAK dropping in MARCH on ABC
Harumph! The sound I make when I’m unsure of something. It’s also the sound I make when I’ve just…you know what never mind I was going to mention something about masturbation, a bar of soap, and police sirens. Whatever. That’s not the story here. (Is it?) We’re talking Avengers: Age of Ultron.
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Karl Urban: “Conversations” totally happening about ‘DREDD’ sequel. DON’T FUGGIN TEASE ME BRO.
Karl Urban says that there could be a Dredd sequel. No shit! I mean yeah duh, there’s a Dredd sequel coming alright! It’s called The Raid 2! Ha! Get it? ‘Cause Dredd is basically a rip-off of the wondrous flick The Raid? Eh — who fucking cares. More than enough room in this fanboy heart for both.
Paul Thomas Anderson x Joaquin Phoenix jam ‘INHERENT VICE’ dropping in December
Oh word? P.T. Anderson and Joaquin Phoenix’s next uber-collab is dropping in December? Well a fucking Merry Christmas to me, too! Said uber-collab-jam is an adaptation of Thomas Pynchon’s Inherent Vice. Which I haven’t read. So yeah.
Sony: ‘SPIDER-MAN’ MOVIES EVERY YEAR! Me: LOLOKAY
In case you’re the last asshole upon a bastion of denial when it comes to Sony’s plans for Spider-Man, you may want to listen up. Some Big Wig Person of Importance has announced that there will be a “Spider-Man” movie every year. Now this totally translates into “we don’t own any cool Marvel properties, so we’re going to puff up the Arachnid Universe.”
‘GODZILLA’ OFFICIAL TRAILER: The LIZARD KING is s**ting on our livessss
Good God (of Lizards) with a side of fuck creme! Am I really going to dig this movie? If the cryptic and vague tea leaves that constitute an official trailer are to be believed (perhaps foolishly), the answer is an emphatic yes.
Harold Ramis Has Passed Away. Ghostbummer
What sweet shit is this? Perhaps a sign that me and my generation is aging; people we love are dying and the initial “how can that possibly be?” is met with “well they weren’t exactly young.” But still – Harold Ramis? Fuck.
WATCH: ‘CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER’ TV Spot may hang mother of all spoilers
Does this TV spot contain a potentially enormous spoiler? Yes. Do I buy said spoiler? Not at all. Is it clever as fuck marketing either way? Aye, aye.
Hit the jump if you dare. (Please dare.)
‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ poster is all, irreverent and s**t
YeahIknoweveryoneandtheirmom has already seen this poster, okay? Kiss my ass and write my lesson plans for me if you’re going to bring that critique hammer down on my squash! Still, it’s gnarly as fuck and frankly I want to wank off to it with you folks.
Hit the jump to see it (again)!
Marvel down to four directors for ‘DOCTOR STRANGE’ flick
Marvel’s Phrase Something-Such (P3? P4?) is going to include a Doctor Strange movie. Why? ‘Cause we will see it, it’ll make money, and then Disney and Marvel will sixty-nine. A glorious, neck muscle-pulling 69, while Winnie the Pooh and Captain America pour gold-laced baby oil over the two companies.
But uh — Doctor Strange news.
‘GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY’ Promo Clip: Hear Rocket Raccoon go full Cooper
Bradley Cooper as Rocket Raccoon is weird. Not at all what I’d picture, want, or cast. But hey whatever it is more Guardians material to sci-wank over.
