How can you replace Jonathan Hickman on Fantastic Four? You can’t, you turkey! Not even Matt Fraction will fill that void for me, and ya’ll know that is saying something. Matt Fraction. Gorgeous head of hair, lovely sets of stories. Not even he can saddle up to Fantastic Four without me screaming “Not my Dad! Dammit!” What I am very excited for is the sister title FF, which seems to be going in a brilliantly Fractionian direction.

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Welcome friends to the place for fans of the sequential art, thrice-engorged breasts, and monologuing. This here column is the watering hole where you can share the funny rags you’re snagging on a given week. The hole itself is Mountain Dew laced with hallucinogens, so right about the time all our faces become gaping maw anuses rocketing lasers into the night sky, begin screaming your choices while running into the wilderness.

You may notice that my choices are indubitably not yours, and that’s cool. Use it as an opportunity to recommend the hotness that no one else is mentioning, or perhaps has not heard of. If you don’t know what’s what titles are arriving this week, hit up Comic List.

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Oh golly. Not only is Jonathan Hickman leaving Fantastic Four this year, it also appears that Matty Fraction is throwing up the deuces towards Invincible Iron Man. This saddens me a great deal, Fraction and Larocca having delivered quality Anthony Stark tales for the past, what, four years? Damn. Double damn.

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Sweet merciful lord, bare pity on me. I am not worthy of all the hotness that Image comics continues to unfurl. I am not. However, with your blessing I will sweat all over them like the excited fanboy I am. New works from Fraction? Graham? And more?

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Wagwan, my friends! What’s good in the world. It’s Wednesday, that pinnacle of the week for the comic book oriented folk. The day when we gather around the comic shelves, or I suppose the digi-shelves, and stoke our nerd inclinations with the newest of funny rags. This is the nearest and dearest column where we wax excited about the titles we’re snagging this week, sharing the particulars and the overrunning joy with one another. It’s a beautiful thing. Hardened nipples. Emptied wallets. Sequential art. What’s not to love?

Don’t know what’s dropping? Hit up ComicList.

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It’s approaching midnight and I sipping liberally from a recently-cracked open two-liter of Pepsi Max. This can only mean a few things. Diablo 3  has launched, my semester is over, and I may very well be dead by the time you read this. Slouched over all fucking South Korean internet cafe Starcraft  stylee. Should I continue sucking wind into the meatier part of this Wednesday, I shall be snagging some comic books. These are the ones I’m digging on. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to tolerate my stupidity and then augment my list with the titles you’re going to procure for an exorbitant sum. Especially if I don’t list your little binky title. I’m willing to riff on anything should you suggest it.

Don’t know what’s dropping? Hit up ComicList.

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Marvel dropped some news yesterday at C2E2, the most glorious of which to me is the news that Jamie McKelvie is taking over as artist on Defenders.

Hit the jump for a  potpourri  of deets.

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Everyone in the Avengers fucking party! I know, I know. Spreading thin, et cetera. I don’t care. Hawkeye  by Fraction and Aja is coming, bringing with it a groin swell from my corner of the room.

Covers and deets post-jump.

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I first really began to take notice of Matt Fraction during his stint on Iron Fist  with Ed Brubaker and David Aja, many moons ago. A lifetime of funny books since. Now the Fraction-Man and Aja are going to be reteaming it seems, and this has my balls aflutter.

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With a headline like that, I better buckle up. It’s that time of the year where the Funny Book Factories begin churning out stunning efforts in mediocrity, otherwise known as Events. Yes sir. Yes ma’am. This week the all ninety-three Avengers teams are going to be throwing down with all fourteen X-Men squads and the price will be paid by readers looking for something not refried and snot-covered. (I thought this was called Civil War?)

Eh! There’s dope books a’dropping this week too. Let’s focus on that. This is Comics We’re Buying This Week. The simplistically titled column where us worshippers of the paneled page can gather around and share the funny book loot we’re snagging this week.  Don’t know what’s coming out? Hit up ComicList.

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