#July2013
The ‘X-FORCE’ MOVIE will feature a 5-Person team. Plus! So many pouches.
Rob Liefeld needs to be the artistic director on this son of a bitch. Just totally lay out some gorgeous costumes with like a million-pouches. Every character played by Vin Diesel (forget the Avengers 2), after we stack on some serious muscles. ‘Cause, you know. Ain’t the X-Force unless it has anatomy-breaking muscles and pouches.
(Unless it’s Uncanny X-Force.)
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BUY THESE FLIPPIN COMICS (7/24/2013) – DON’T CALL IT A COMEBACK!
Johnny Hotsauce here! Longtime listener, first time caller. Or whatever. So I did it! I incepted myself into Caff-Pow’s brain, convinced him it was time to let me bother you nice folks in a more official capacity. (Basically I just drew my face on a can of Kickstarter, stuck it in his mind-safe when he was busy looking at butts on Tumblr)
With the dawn of the digital-age of comic books, Comixology has, in many cases, done away with our need to go to the comic book store. But, as Caff-Pow has so lamented before, something feels amiss. Where, now, is the camaraderie? Where can we go to talk comics? Where can we shoot the four-color-fantastic with like-minded geeks? Who will be there to help us decide how to spend our hard-earned coin? HERE. Right here at OL, friends. Here is our chance to talk shop, compare notes on the best comics this week has to offer. This column has too long lay dormant, but like any comic book hero you ever loved, death is no obstacle.
So, without further preamble, let’s do the damned thing! (And I’m on a budget here, people, so if I don’t mention your most beloved book, I implore you to speak up in the comments and share your love!)
THANOS confirmed for ‘GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY’, Purple-Headed Death GET
What fresh hell is this. Why so much interesting news today? Wasn’t SDCC like two days ago? Oh, you say it isn’t interesting to you. Hmm. I see. Head nod. Then I draw the Infinity Gauntlet, and punch you in the sternum. I don’t even know what I’m typing anymore. James Gunn is more interesting than me. Hit the jump to check out his funky fresh words regarding Thanos.
MARVEL ANNOUNCES ‘AVENGERS’ SEQUEL, ‘AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON.’ WOOO.
Fucking Christ, SDCC. I’m supposed to be drinking with friends, bowling and shit. Then you drop this fucking news on a Saturday night. So uh, yeah. The Avengers sequel has an official title.
‘AGENTS OF S.H.I.E.L.D.’ gets a PREMIERE DATE. Prepare for AUTUMNAL AGENCY.
Fuck yeah! Fall is typically my favorite season. Take the weather, combine with football (I am a generic American male, bred to appreciate thinly-veiled homoeroticism), and now we can add in a dash of SHIELD. ABC has revealed that the clunky-titled spin-off of Avengers will be dropping in September. Which — I know that means it isn’t Fall — is close enough to Autumn for me.
BEAR MCCREARY is the composer for ‘AGENTS OF SHIELD.’ FRAK YES.
Oh baby. Bear McCreary is joining the production of Agents of SHIELD, bringing his compositional wizardry to the show. McCreary was the composer for Battlestar Galactica, which stands somewhere between “My favorite show of all time” and “My favorite thing of all time.” These balls tighten.
VIN DIESEL totally NOT PLAYING IT COOL about potential ‘AVENGERS 2’ ROLE.
Man. Doesn’t Vinny D’s recent behavior remind you a lot of the time that Sean Young lost her mind whilst campaigning for the role of Catwoman? Sweet Holy Moley, Vin. Try and keep your geek-cock locked up in them expensive-ass jeans at least until they offer you the role. Amirite?
MARVEL wants to meet with VIN DIESEL. RIDE OR DIE as THANOS, AMIRITE?
OH SHIT. I knew I had been good this year. Said my prayers. Eaten my vegetables. How else can I explain what is obviously the greatest casting that Marvel hasn’t made quite yet? The Studio that Tony Built has requested a meeting with one of the stars of This Summer’s Best Movie (So Far), and I’m half-giddy, half-delirious at the world we are living in.
New ‘AGENTS OF SHIELD’ PROMO FEATURES THINGS.
Hey, it’s a new promo for Agents of SHIELD. It’s really short. Doesn’t feature much. However, it’s pretty neat that this show exists. A couple of days ago I mentioned to my Dad that Coulson lived, and he’d be on the TV show. Goddamn blew his ass out. Couldn’t believe we were getting a TV show from the Avengers movie. It served as a reminder that the entire enterprise is pretty cool.
WHO IS F**KING LEFT TO CAST: BENICIO DEL TORO joins ‘GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY.’
Benicio Del Toro has joined Guardians of the Galaxy. And you thought that Man of Steel had a ridiculous ensemble. Eh? Yeah, stick that notion in your butt and fly to the Moon! Turkeys. Wait — what was I saying? Oh yeah! Also, the Good Dude has also signed a multi-picture deal with the Marvelous Company. Anyone want to join me in the Stroke-It-Circle, hoping that he is playing Thanos?
