Hey dickhead dorks. Yeah, you. The ones that gripe. You can scratch something off your list of Infinitely Long Things to Bitch about. The new Spider-Man flick by Marc Webb starring Andrew Garfield is bringing back web-shooters. Praise Allah! Right? The confirmation comes from Emma Stone dropping an interview with MTV. Hit the jump for the details.

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Earlier this week we got our first glimpse of Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man. Now today running throughout the various pipes and tubings of the internet are excerpts from The Los Angeles Times‘ interview with him. Taken from The Envelope, the awards blog for the Times, Garfield opens up about the first two weeks of filming the new Spider-Man flick.

Hit the jump for excerpts, and an insight into the new Peter Parker. Hint: he seems less doughy and dorky than Tobey McGuire. I like.

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Let’s play the game! The first set photos have leaked of Andrew Garfield as Peter Parker! Now, it’s up to us to complete the second part of the game. We stare at these pictures long and hard. With our fanboy nerd goggles on. Then we get hyper-analytic and needlessly extrapolate!

Hit the jump for the pictures, and don’t forget to either laud or praise the film based on these pictures alone!

It’s your nerd civic duty.

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Completely sensationalist title! Ha! I got you! And I just stole your cookie, what the fuck are you going to do? But no seriously. Apparently Emma Stone was on Jay Leno last night, and she dropped the claim that she’s going to be around for a few web-slinging flicks. When Jay asked how long she’ll be keeping her blond hair, she responded “There’s a few Spidermen, so I may have to keep it for a couple of years.”

Wut!

Every Spider-Man dude knows that Gwen bites the fucking bullet hard. It’s one of the multitude of reasons that Parker is a whiny bitch. But! Could they be changing something? Is Gwen going to live? Sure, her surviving one film doesn’t mean she isn’t going to die eventually. However, let’s dare to dream. I’d be very excited if they decided to keep Gwen as Parker’s main squeeze.

Not only have we done the whole courting of Mary Jane, but I’m going to hit you guys with something: I fucking hate Mary Jane. Yeah, I know she symbolizes the impossibility that the average nerd can’t attain. What is more of an accomplishment than the dweeb acquiring the supermodel who gets him?

Not much.

But I’ve always preferred Stacy to MJ, and if this means she’ll be keeping a pulse for the foreseeable future, then good.

Someone is going to a funeral! As Spider-Man begins shooting this week, the first set photos have dropped. Just what the fuck is going on here? Slashfilm speculates that Gwen is attending (spoilers, fools) the funeral of her father. Apparently Father Stacy   passes away in the comic books and implores Spidey to watch over Gwen. Guess he’s going to be pretty upset that its his webbing that snaps her damn neck in the funnies.

But also, why not Uncle Ben’s funeral? Who knows.

Hit the jump for the pictures.

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..Sort of? Psyche! Total tabloid title there. But yeah, this is a look at Emma Stone with blond hair. Stone, a natural blond is known for rocking a firey mane. But with Stacy being an Aryan posterchild, she took it back to her roots. Literally! LOL, I’m a comedian. Puns ahoy!

But seriously, she looks fucking gorgeous. And very Gwen Stacy. I’m sold, super sold. I was sold before, and now I’m doubling-down. A double order of yes.

Hit the jump for more pictures of her loving ridiculously Gwen Stacy-esque.

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Denis Leary is swinging onto the set of the new Spider-Man movie. Puns, ahoy! Leary will be playing George Stacy, father of the inestimably superior Parker love interest, Gwen. Well, until she all gets her neck broken and shit. It’s casting that I wouldn’t have seen coming, but to be truthful, I wasn’t even contemplating Gwen’s family or the necessity of casting them.

I’m cool with it, as long as it doesn’t result in Lenny Clarke getting cast as anything but a corpse in the flick. Leary’s friend seems to be his sidekick, and seems to find his way into things the former is cast in. The problem? He is the anti-funny, eliminating funny within a thirty foot radius of anything he does.

Thoughts on the casting?

Oh good! I’ve been eagerly anticipating who is going to play the preachy annoying ass old Uncle and the fucking useless save for emo-kid pep talks Aunt in the Spider-Man reboot being directed by Marc Webb. Well, now I have to wait no longer! Apparently both roles have been cast.

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Martin Sheen, who I would certainly consider one of Hollywood’s most avuncular actors, has reportedly been cast as the new Uncle Ben in Marc Webb’s reboot. It’s unclear whether he will appear in the main narrative, which would suggest the story is retelling Spider-Man’s origins from the beginning, or whether he will (probably more likely) just appear in flashbacks. Either way, this fits well with earlier reports that the filmmakers were casting a child Peter Parker, which definitely would involve scenes when Uncle Ben was alive. Also, another report says Sally Field is in talks to play Aunt May.

Thoughts? I don’t really care either way. Casting that neither offends, nor amazes.

And on a final note, may I just say fuck Uncle Ben. Dude is always preaching about responsibility and shit, but he didn’t even take out a life insurance policy on himself. Then his dumb ass gets shot because he won’t give up his rickety piece of shit car, and leaves his disgustingly old wife behind to tend to his socially retarded but brilliant nephew. He needs to get off his soap box, but that’s just my opinion.

SO yeah. The Lizard is the baddie in Marc Webb’s Spider-Man reboot, starring Andrew Garfield. Cool? I’m not getting particularly stoked, but that isn’t because I think the movie isn’t going to be deec. It’s got Webb and Garfield and that’s enough to have my interest. But Rhys Ifans as Dr. Curt Connors? Okay, sure! The sort of news which is worth noting, but really don’t get me feeling it in either direction.

I can appreciate the direction they seem to be taking with the new flick. No Goblin as the villain? No Mary Jane as the primary love interest? Parker is in college? Say what you will about how soon they’re rebooting the franchise, at least they’re putting a different stamp on it. Right? Sure!

What say you?