I don’t give a fuck. My shitty puns are your bowel movements are my small moments of job. Marc Webb has been confirmed to direct the sequel to this summer’s quiet little superhero flick, and that’s all good to me. While I don’t have a particular love the vehicle, it had a lot of HEAHHHT and Emma Stone. People came down on it with hammers and claws, but they were just bitter assholes rightfully annoyed at how quickly the thing had been rebooted. Sure, the plot was a fudgy diaper. The plot for Avengers was too, and that didn’t stop people from throwing rope all over that film.

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I dug Marc Webb’s riff on Spider-Man, even if the storyline was a cavalcade of mess, wrapped in an entirely gutted plot point. I’d love to see the dude return, and it turns out so would Sony. Shit is just a bit complicated.

Ain’t it always?

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[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]

It’s not hard to see why Peter Parker is one of the most popular characters in all of comics-lore.

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Would you be shocked if you found out that a comic book franchise is aiming to be a trilogy? I hope not.

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[As always, spoiler-free and barebones on plot description.  If you want the third act twists spelled out for you, please visit Roger Ebert’s site.]

But seriously:  this film is worth admission alone because this time, they hired a fucking casting director.  Gone is the triumvirate of shit that Tobey, Kirsten and Franco brought to the table.

Director Marc Webb gone and killed it.  You will fall in love with Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone in this film.  They’re just glowing with chemistry and love and presence.  Garfield takes a half hour or so to get there, but Stone is just a magnet for attention in every scene, and never in a presumptuous or overbearing way.  They work, and they work very well as the leads in this re-take on Spider-Man’s origin.

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To be perfectly clear: I don’t expect this to mean anything, I just find the speculation fun.

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The Spider-Man and Avengers movie universes could collide, and goddamn I say no.

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Just today I got into a conversation with Rendar about this here flick. He thinks it’s going to be forgettable, but enjoyable. I’m not sure. I sniff the distinct scent of ass wafting off all these promotional materials. Where do you land on this reboot? Yay? Nay? Check out the clip and let me know.

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From what I can tell, the majority of the new footage in this four-minute preview of Amazing Spider-Man  comes at the beginning. Unfortunately what could be a pretty righteous moment is marred by vomit-worthy dubstep and dollar store special effects.

What do you think? Check it out and let me know.

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New Amazing Spider-Man  trailer, but I’m having a hard time caring. Imma be in Avengers Heaven in little over three hours.

Up, up, and away web!

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