Fuck yes. Rian Johnson has been making gorgeous af movies with cinematographer Steve Yedlin for a hit minute now (could that sentence have sucked any harder? whatever). So I’m glad to see Johnson has been able to bring Yedlin into the Star Wars stable as the director dives into the upcoming episode he is helming.

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Oh sweet baby Jesus, Rian Johnson is working on a cyberpunk script. This douchebag (hi!) and cyberpunk go together like latex bondage porn and autoerotic asphyxiation. I am literally hardened at every point on my body where blood can flow to just thinking about this. Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

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Caff-Note: The Dude didn’t write an introduction, so just imagine him shouting these from a mountaintop, whilst brandishing lightning bolts and delicious esoteria. Also, props to The Dude for week after week of High 5s this year. Gods bless.

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Ms. Marvel in Avengers 2? Frak yeah. Carol Danvers is a goddamn fantastic character. As a hell of a strong female lead, she is just sort of lass that Whedon would gravitate towards. Here is hoping there is something to this rumor. Especially if Emily Blunt is in consideration. Coming out of Looper, make mine Blunt. Or something. Should probably just let that saying die.

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The best way to describe Bruce Willis is that when he wants to do it, B-Willy can bring the charisma. Dude did it in Looper, and maybe I’m jumping the gun but I’m feeling his perma-schtick in this trailer as well. Now uh, do we know what this shit is rated?

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Gather round, children. Taste the delicious taste of my nectar. This here sugary paste didn’t distill itself. No sir. No ma’am. Salutations to all genders, the myriad of multiple possibilities in a world where binary is only for coding! Ha! Speaking of delectable, what a pun, no? Where I am from you respect your mother and sharpen your pun. Did I ever tell you the story about how my Great Great Great Vat Father was shanked behind a stim stage for mouthing off without a retort? Old mucous-face tried to parry with a master of repartee and when his wits ran dry, his blood ran fluidly. Never forget what Jean-Paul said. Oh sure he was a coke-head and was banging the chicks working under him and sure he ultimately went even way too Red for my socialist, anarchist, burn-it-down ass. None the less. Remember when Jeanie said.

Words are loaded pistols.

What does that have to do with this column? Nothing. This is Monday Morning Commute. Gather around the watering hole, us shackled to the churning of the capitalist tides! How are you hiding from the next sixty years of brain-numbing repetition? This week, which arts are you finding salvation in? Movies, music, television, funny book, new sexy toys. I want to hear it all. Share it.

This is what I am digging.

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Looper hasn’t even come out yet (unfortunately), and it has already received a retrofitting. Ain’t nothing that says love from the geek community like taking an appreciated commodity and dipping it into an 8 bit well.

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How good is this new trailer for Looper? It uses dubstep, and I don’t hate it. I’m serious.

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…okay so I couldn’t help but gloom onto a little thing is this glorious international trailer for Looper. There’s a quickly passing scene where a billboard advertises some sort of product giving you telekinesis. It’s the little, the minute, that’ll populate and build this world I can’t help to experience. Can’t wait.

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One of the reasons that Rian Johnson’s Looper finally getting off the ground was that it got some additional Chinese financing. Now a perk of that financing its manifesting itself for Chinese audiences, and I’m like, mad jelly.

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