With Halloween straight-up body slamming the box office this past weekend, one thing is for certain. A shit load of money is going to be made from rebooting other classic horror franchises. So, it isn’t surprising that Friday the 13th is up for a new installment. What is surprising is that LeBron fucking James could be producing it.

Read the rest of this entry »

This. This is a thing. This is a thing that is happening.

Read the rest of this entry »

[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task – choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]

Most us are nothing more than sacks of flesh feebly held together with some chicken-finger ligaments. We’re weak, cowardly, and directionless. The human condition, if you haven’t noticed, is not generally teeming with dignity. Consequently, we rely on those who manage to combine natural talent with hard work so as transcend the mundane. Whether into the realms of fiction or reality, we all venture forth in hopes of finding a hero.

So there’s really nothing more treacherous than when a hero turns his back on his admirers.

Unfortunately, there’re more than a few examples of our heroes failing us. No, these don’t include instances in which our champions fight on our behalves but fall short. Hell, dying for a cause might be the most heroic act of all. Instead, idols truly disappoint us when they disregard the joy and admiration we’ve afforded them, essentially spitting upon the very people who’ve forged the crowns adorning their heads.

So this begs the question – who is the most traitorous hero of all? Well, we’ve narrowed it down to two contenders: LeBron James and Hollywood Hogan.

Read the rest of this entry »

According to the rumor I just started, the Miami Heat have acquired the most amazing free agent in the history of professional sports.