#October2015
‘Halo 5: Guardians’ Opening Cinematic: Nathan Fillion’s Spartan Race
Truthfully, I ain’t watching this. I know it’s somewhat contradictory, since I seem to indulge in every spoiler ever. But, I don’t know. Why watch an out-of-context opening cinematic for a game I’m sweating? I can wait the less-than-two-months. How about you? Are you going to peep this cinematic? Are you going to play Halo 5?
‘Halo 5’ hitting Xbox One on October 27. This is a (master) chief opportunity for Microsoft
GET IT? Master chief opportunity? Cause it looks like fucking Halo 5 is the only AAA, console-exclusive title actually making its 2015 release date! SHIT PUNS.
Of course: ‘Halo 2’ Remaster will have content tying into ‘Halo 5: Guardians’
There are steps! FUCKING STEPS to getting suckers like me to buy the same game again. Especially this generation. The first step is to REMASTER THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF IT. That basically means make it look pretty. Because people like me are superficial. I don’t even know what 1080p means, can’t tell it from 720p. But I know I need LAST-GEN in 1080p. The second fucking step is to TIE THE REMAKE INTO THE FUCKING FUTURE RELEASES. The people behind Halo: The Collection – Later Bungie, Have Fun In Mediocrity HD; Spartan Collection get this.
Rumor: REMASTERED ‘HALO’ COLLECTION dropping on XB1 THIS YEAR
HEY KIDS! Bummed out that Halo 5: Guardians of the Galaxy ain’t dropping until 2015? Me too! Are you also a consumerist whore like me, who will buy visually improved editions of games you already own? THEN I MAY HAVE A FUCKING SALVE FOR YOU.
‘HALO 5: GUARDIANS’ dropping on XB1 IN Fall 2015.
Looks like we’re all going to have wait until 2015 for that killer game for the XB1. (Unless you’re not down with Halo, in which case you probably don’t own an XB1 anyways.) Yup-yupyup-yupyupyup, the next installment in the franchise is dropping then.
