#July2011
‘Link To The Past’ Is Way Better With A Portal Gun. Way Better.
Link to the Past. A safe go-to game when you feel like drunkenly debating what the best game of all time is with your friends. Dorkly has taken the classic game and imagined what it would be like with a fucking Portal gun. Answer: outstanding.
Hit the jump for the video.
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Press Start!: Super Mario and Christians Forget Mushrooms, Hit The LSD.
I am a sick man. I am a diseased man. While I wish I was the Man from Dostoyevsky’s Underground, I’m just a nerd. Afflicted with phlegm and nausea and a quivering of the bowels. So in all honesty, my friends, I’m pounding out this column quicker than Billy Batson can shazam the fuck outta Dodge. Gray and green and brown matter is flying all over my keyboard. I need the dull glow of Theraflu and the prone position.
Press Start!. Column that spouts off on top five things that caught my attention in gaming this week.
Sony’s Tim Schaaff Thought The PSN Hack Was A “Great Experience”. Oh Bro.
The PSN hack was a kidney punch combo’d into a nuts stomp, and gave Sony something of a drooping around the world. We all stared. Some aghast. Some amused. Some both. It had to totally suck for everyone involved over at Sony, right? Naw, bro! Sony’s network entertainment president Tim Schaaff was having the time of his life.
Watch The Entire BioShock Infinite E3 Demo. Right Here. So Far Away.
Confession: I cannot watch this. The entire BioShock Infinite E3 demo. Can’t watch. If I do, it’ll send me into a tizzy of half-words, much-vomit, and sprints around the neighborhood. I’m excitable. I need this game. My body cannot handle such a tither. I bring it to you though, should you be interested and capable of absorbing so much rock knowing the game is still a turn of the calendar away.
Legendary Pictures Bringing ‘Mass Effect’ Movie Panel To Comic-Con.
Legendary Pictures is tasked with bringing a beloved fucking glorious video game franchise of mine to the flickering, silver, something, something, screen. This project of theirs sn’t something on the back burner. Oh no. In fact, there’s going to be a panel for the Mass Effect movie at Comic-Con.
Jealousy of attendees. Rising.
‘Uncharted’ Film Now Headed Up By ‘Limitless’ Director Neil Burger.
I sighed a big sigh of relief when David O. Russel and his Marky Mark-powered film adaptation of Uncharted fell apart and went down the toilet. The man tapped to replace O. Russel and Funky Bunch is Neil Burger, who recently directed Limitless.
BioShock Infinite’s Protagonist Is Revealed. Booker is Sexy, Grizzled.
This week’s edition of EGMi has the protagonist of BioShock Infinite on its glorious cover. Not only that, but the gorgeous artwork pays homage to one of the most classic Uncanny X-Men covers. Ever. None other than Uncanny X-Men #141, or the X-Men comic that all of us mutant-fellaters point to as a high-water mark for the series.
Hit the jump to check it out.
‘Gears of War 3’ Leaked Over The Weekend. Pirate Devils!
While you and I were loving freedom and capitalism and hamburgers over the weekend and into Monday evening, pirate scum Communists were out ruining everyone’s fun and hating our lovely country. They thumbed their noses at our free market and released an early version of Gears of War 3 onto torrent sites.
Report Claims Game Industry Is Worth A Cool $74 Billion In 2011.
The game industry is anything but struggling. While my lemonade stand ain’t rakin’ in shit this summer, the companies behind some of our favorite distractions are cumulatively rolling in the cash. In large part thanks to the behemoth that is mobile gaming.
Rumor: ‘PlayStation 4’ Set For 2012 Release, With Kinect-Type Controls.
Take it with a grain of salt, but the rumor du jour is that PlayStation 4 is going to drop next year with Kinect-type controls. Oh goodie, the virus spreads!
