#August2013
XBOX ONE no longer requires KINECT to be plugged in. STILL GOTTA F**KING BUY IT.
The XBONE song and dance is a curious one. Full of twists, turns, pirouettes and shit. The latest little move in this tango is the announcement that the Xboner does not require a Kinect to be plugged in to operate. Which is sort of neat, but also like sort of “how about you don’t fucking force me to buy it then”, right? Definitely giving credence to the rumors that 2014 shall see a Kinect-less version of Microsoft’s next console.
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AMAZON developing ANDROID CONSOLE. MOAR CONSOLES ALWAYS.
Errbuddy looking to get into that delicious gaming…game? If reports are to believed, Amazon is on their grind. Developing an Android console. Why not? I mean, it isn’t like we are saturated beyond belief in the gaming market. Does this interest your beautiful asses at all?
OH SHII — ‘GRAND THEFT AUTO ONLINE’ REVEAL dropping AUG. 15
Oh snap! Grand Theft Auto Online is being revealed this Thursday, August 15! OhwaititsjusttheonlinecomponentGTAV? Eh. I am significantly less excited now. Just wait though. I’m bet I’m eating those words and barfing them all over my feet in three days. Would be par for Caff-Pow’s life course.
PS PLUS not required to RECORD AND STREAM GAMES ON PS4. XBOX ONE? $$$
How long until this Microsoft’s stance on this is rolled back? It seems like a swaying song and dance at this point. Sony unleashes a feature for free. Microsoft charges for it. We all gnash our teeth. Said feature becomes available for free on the XBONE.
UBISOFT: ‘ASSASSIN’S CREED’ has an END IN MIND, ME: LOL, K.
Yeah, no way. Not buying this blathering from the Ubisoft Henchmen at all. They’re trying to convince me that Assassin’s Creed has an end to it. Mmmhmm. I’m willing to bet that end they envision has a very sinuous, unforgiving tie not to a story that they have in mind, but rather mad dollar bills that they are raking in. I’m sure Call of Duty and Madden have an end, too. So color me convinced that they don’t have some glorious end point in mind, but rather like the LOST writers will cobble something together in a manic, blood-soaked orgy of self-congratulation and panic at the last moment.
‘DRAGON AGE: INQUISTION’ graces GAME INFORMER’S SEPTEMBER COVER.
We now know the September blowout contained within the pages of Game Informer. That shit is nothing other than Dragon Age: Inquisition. I’ve loved the first two installments of the franchise in differing degrees, and I’m sure I’ll love this one. What I want more than anything from this installment is a steady fucking aesthetic and game design that’ll persist. This third game seems to be yet another iteration of the franchise, changing up approaches from both the first and second titles. Aiight, cool. But let’s try and create one that’ll fucking stick. Define your universe, friends. Then own it.
Hit the jump for deets, as well as the cover.
CLIFF BLESZINSKI teases NEXT PROJECT with SOMETHING LIKE AN IMAGE.
DUDE HUGE has teased us with a glimpse at his NEXT FUCKING PROJECT. The image itself doesn’t really do anything for me. I imagine it doesn’t do much for anyone. However, what it represents is something special. It works deep into my testicles, tingling them and reminding them of a gaming world where HUGE DUDES canvassed the Earth. The gaming industry is much more lively when CliffyB is dropping games on our asses. In our asses. Everywhere.
Hit the jump for more info. Oh, and the image.
OUCH: NINTENDO sold 160,000 WII U CONSOLES in THE WORLD last quarter.
Buh-buh-buh, it’s a tablet as a controller! How can you peons not understand the irrefutable awesomeness that is an over-priced under-powered peripheral masquerading as a console? Fools! Invalids!
‘CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS’ is probably revealed, MORE DUTIES FOREVER.
Another year, another Call of Duty. This newest one is reportedly by Infinity Ward, and subtitled Ghosts. Makes sense, since IW has been on that every-other-year grind for a while, and Ghosts is nice and mysterious.
Hit the jump for more.
Microsoft’s CREATIVE DIRECTOR that tweeted ALWAYS-ON HATE is fired.
What a shocker. A Microsoft employee who literally spread his ass cheeks and shat upon potential customers worried about the Durascal 720’s always-on policy has gotten nixed. What a dumb fuck.
