It appears that some sort of malicious douchebag planted that Half-Life 3 trademark application over in Europa or whatever. God dammit.

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How quickly can I infiltrate the ranks of GameStop? I must walk among them, showing prowess at peddling bullshit warranties and slamming pre-orders down customers’ throats. For if I can ascend to manager by November 15, I will get myself a free PS4.

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