Here’s some cold comfort. Some big son of a bitch asteroid recently passed us by, giving us the finger and giggling at our mortality. While it’s all well and good that it didn’t rock us, it also turns out that the death-dealing rock was twice as large as previously thought.

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Apparently Jupiter is like, way slacking. You see, that big gassy son of a bitch is supposed to be our bulwark against cosmic refuse and shit smashing into us and like, ending  civilization. Yet according to new reports cataclysmic asteroids used to be way more common than we’d rather think about.

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