Well, we saw this shit coming, didn’t we? I always imagined that Nolan would only be up for three Batman flicks. He’d complete the storyline he wanted to tell, throw the deuces up to everyone, and ride off into the sunset.   This idea of mine was only strengthened by a recent report that Nolan told Bale he’d be like totally done playing Bruce Wayne after the next flick. And then, news came out today where Nolan up and confirmed it.

EW via Slashfilm:

I feel very glad that I’m doing another Batman film. I think it would have been daunting to sit down and write an original script after Inception. I love working within the realm and rules of our Batman world. It’s kind of nice to have someplace to go that I’m super-excited about.

I must say that I’m glad – I’m very, very glad – to be embarking on the last chapter of our Batman saga without any sense of obligation or duty to the studio. They did very well with Inception. So I’m able to go into finishing our story in a very enthusiastic way.

I’m happy as hell with this news. It gives Nolan and the cast to go out in a blaze of glory in their final installment. Wrap everything up, leave their stamp on the universe, and then laugh as they watch other people try and top them. Sure, the franchise ain’t going to die. Way too much money. And maybe Nolan would even have made a better fourth movie than whoever comes next. But as Rendarbones Frankenpepsi says, perhaps there’s something to going out on top. Riding off into the sunset.

Thoughts? Impressions? Hit the comments box.

This is Variant Covers. Keep your fucking fingers off the cover. Mind the spine, yo. The comic book column where I spit with vitriol, glee, and mostly confusion about the books dropping this week. Hit the comments section with derisive, witty, or contributory recommendations and comments.

Shazam.

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Thor: The Mighty Avenger #6
My friends, we have failed. As comic book reading collective, we have failed. Failed hard. Last weekend news leaked out that Thor: The Mighty Avenger was getting axed. This is nothing sort of a calamitous disregard for one of the most wondrous, beautiful mainstream titles hitting shelves. Canned, canned, canned. While other titles are hitting the shelves, depleted of quality, offering nothing new to existing mythos. I am significantly bummed out about this. Half of me wants to recommend nothing more than this title. A militant stance. But alas, there’s other worthwhile shit dropping, and that would be unfair to them.

But!, please, check this shit out tomorrow. The good news is that apparently they’ve been given the ability to wrap up the storyline by the final installment in January. You’re only six issues behind. It’ll cost you nothing more than something like twenty-four Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers. It’s a refreshing take on an existing origin. The dialogue is great, the artwork is gorgeous. Both of these creators, Roger Langridge and Chris Samnee will assuredly continue on doing dope work somewhere else.

But still. Hit this while you can.

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Elsewhere In the Marvel Universe:
Thankfully, I don’t think we’re failing in regard to following Hickman’s current work on the Fantastic Four. Tomorrow sees the release of Fantastic Four #585, which promises to work towards the conclusion of the “Three” storyline. I have a good idea that someone is going to die. I think maybe the storyline’s name gives that away. Hickman’s continues Reed Richard’s desire to solve everything while grounding it with a thunderous round of heart and humor. Last month when Ben Grimm got his one-week of humanity back, and went to see Alicia? I teared up. I know, fuck me.

Also dropping is Captain America #612 which follows Bucky as he goes on trial for his crimes as the Winter Soldier. While I like the story, and generally everything Brubaker does, I’m wondering how long he’s going to examine Bucky’s guilt over his past. Fair enough it’s been introspective to this point, and now he’s dealing with the public outrage regarding it. As I said, I still dig it. And finally, Invincible Iron Man #32 promises to be a slobberknocker, as Iron Man throws down with Detroit Steel. Fraction penned action scenes being realized by Salvador Larroca? I’m there.

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This is why I’m an unprincipled asshole. Well, among other things. You see, despite being totally meh (at best) about the Green Lantern trailer, I’m still excited for it. How does that work? I have no idea. Today, Bleeding Cool posted a few images from the movie, and I have to say, I dig on Parallax, if the artwork in question really is from the movie. Looks pretty god damn cool.

Hit the jump for the potential picture of Parallax, as well as Peter Sarsgaard with a considerably swollen dome-piece.

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The Green Lantern Trailer is finally upon us, after last week’s cockteasing from Entertainment Tonight. I’ll divide the trailer into two distinct halves.

The first is Ryan Reynolds playing Ryan Reynolds. Not only is Hal Jordan apparently written like another Reynolds douchebag cast-off, which he isn’t in the comic books, but Reynolds himself is just doing his same old thing. He isn’t inhabiting a character, he’s draping his schtick over a mythos. Let me be clear, the parts where he’s acting fucking suck, and my dick shrinks a little bit.

Also, Blake Lively, I’m glad to see you dispell any sort of notion that you could act that you may have given us in The Town.

The second is that the epic bullshit that goes down in the trailer really snagged my geek balls. Like, I dug on it a lot. The whole flying through space thing? Sweet. Seeing Oa? Sweet.

Unfortunately, Reynolds Being Reynolds As Jordan has smashed apart any sort of expectations I may have had for the movie. I’m hoping I’m wrong, and that as he matures through the movie he’ll become something resembling anything other than Hey Guys I’m Ryan Reynolds.

Hit the jump to check out the trailer. Then hit the comments box with your thoughts. I’m very interested to gauge the response from you guys.

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[Source: Steven Anderson via Game Freaks]

[Chris Samnee via Comic Twart]

Chris Samnee, artist on the joyride Thor: The Mighty Avenger, is one of my current favorites. So it makes sense that his minimalist take of his on the JLA gives me a fanboy boner alert. Head over to Comic Twart for more minimalist renditions of your favorite collection of capes and cowls by some rather talented folk.

Alright, so I’ve sinned. I began coming across a lot of the inter-chatter on Twitter and comic book websites regarding a megaton bomb that drops today in B&R #16. So, despite having not read it – Pepsibones is snagging the OL log today – I cheated and looked it up. My impressions? Eh! Not really blown away, but that doesn’t mean I object. Hit the jump for the spoiler!, and my take.

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Variant Covers. Your one-stop shop for the comic books I’m excited about dropping this Wednesday. Your chance to comment, and recommend titles you’re reading not only this week, but in general. A brothel of pathetic attempts at intellectual dialogues, and more glaringly, juvenile jokes. Welcome, I’m excited you’re here.

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Scarlet #3
In recent weeks, I’ve tried to ease up on my bashing of writers. Well, ignoring the fact that I took Mark Millar behind the woodshed. Particularly writers that I like, and respect. So whereas I used to bemoan Brian Michael Bendis’ decline, I’ve tried to rationalize it under the idea that he carries an enormous work load for Marvel. Far too many pages for me to fathom churning out every month. I know he’s a talented writer. I know it.

Scarlet is case-in-point.

My brother and I are big fans of Scarlet, Bendis and Maleev’s creator-owned title being published through Marvel’s Icon label. As I’ve detailed before, the time that has been put into this book bleeds through in oodles of quality. Oodles, guys and gals, oodles. The title’s distinguishing feature is the smashing and tearing of the fourth-wall, with Scarlet talking directly to the audience throughout the book. Juxtapose that son of a bitch with Maleev’s creative use of paneling, and you have something that snags you by the nipples right away.

Scarlet’s recruiting a revolution, and she wants you to join in. Trust me, when a sexy femme fatale is talking to you, the loins surge.

It’s a solid title, with tropes that aren’t particularly new, but as I said, they’re executed well. Bendis’ wit shines through, and Maleev is fucking gorgeous as ever. The dude could pencil two pigeons fucking and I’d be on-board. The sort of artwork that could carry a title, but with the writing, simply compliments it.

Grab this son of a bitch.

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Baltimore: The Plague Ships #4
It seems like every time I turn around, a new issue of The Plague Ships is flying its way onto shelves. Get it, cause it stars vampires? Flying? I’m a fucking dunce? I concur. And that’s absolutely fine with me. While it isn’t righteous enough to command my full attention with every issue, the title entertains me in a mindless sort of way that I sometimes need. You should seem me when I’m reading an issue of S.H.I.E.L.D by Hickman. I got a pad of paper, and a pen. I’m scribbling notes and asking rhetorical questions like the grad school lit major loser that I am.

The Plague Ships is a way to decompress. I want to emphasize that this is no fucking knock on Mignola. The title is tight, entertaining, and extremely sexy in the artwork department. It operates on a level that I can definitely feel. Sometimes it’s perfectly fine to be nothing more than fun. For the burgeoning intellectual who is going to give some brilliant reading of Plague Ships in the comments box, let me stop you: you’re probably right, but I’m turning my fucking brain off for this title, and riding the wind. Get it? Like a vampire? Yeah, fuck me.

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Superboy #1
Lest you think I’m packed to the gills with dookie when I say I’ll read anything you recommend to me, consider this: prior to about six months ago, I had never heard of Jeff Lemire. A reader with good taste recommended that I snag up Sweet Tooth and I did so. Since then, my ass crush for the dude has been immeasurable. Love him. I’ll admit I’ve only ingested seven issues or so of his work, as I can only grab Sweet Tooth in TPB around these parts, but I dig him.

So with that said, his name alone is enough to push the relaunch of Superboy onto me. What’s it going to be about? Damned if I know. The synopsis promises wonder and the beginning of the next great epic in the DC universe, but I mean, c’mon. That’s cream puff bullshit. All I know is that it’s a very talented writer getting a crack at an up-and-down icon within the stretched parameters of Metropolis.

Sometimes the author is enough for me to check something out. Actually an author I like is always enough for me to give something a try.

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This is a moment of zen for myself. A moment of clarity that I really need to clench down on.   I need to recall that no matter how mediocre and blah Superman Returns was, Singer’s meh-core movie never, ever came near the stunning shitstorm that Tim Burton’s rendition of Clark Kent would have been. Like, seriously. Just consider these pictures of the emo kid abortion suit that he would have suited Superman up in.

Fuck Tim Burton. I hope we’re all approaching a moment when he can agree, unequivocally that he sucks. Maybe we’ll never agree on whether he’s always sucked. Some people think so, but I actually enjoyed a lot of his flicks. But after his last few movies, it’s obvious: the dude isn’t even trying anymore. Throw Johnny Depp acting like a complete zany douche, mix with a generic Elfman soundtrack, and a dash of his annoying partner Helena Bonham Carter, and you’ve got a zillion dollar movie and a Hot Topic line of clothing for all the misunderstood kids to enjoy.

Fuck Tim Burton. Hit the jump to see his Superman costume that can also go fuck itself.

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We all know the print medium is dying. We all know that comic book sales have been sagging lately. Grandma titties sagging. What can the two brutes on the block do to attempt to stimulate the market? Well, they’ve wised the fuck up and rolled back prices on their comics from $3.99 to $2.99 on a lot of their shit.

Good.

With digital sales of Ultimate Thor #1 almost fucking matching the print copies, they need to do something to put more of us, the great unwashed, back into comic book stores. Slashing prices is a start, though I think ultimately it won’t be enough. The leaf is dying, the bits and bytes reigning supreme more and more. But hey, it makes me happy.