#November2011
Variant Covers: Alan Moore’s Beard Is Your God Now.
There’s! There’s! There’s comic books dropping this week. As per every week, lest the Good Lords strike me dead. I can’t fathom living in a world without the weekly comic book shuffle. Snag the rags, dissect the diegesis and party until my pants come off. This is Variant Covers, the column where I blather about the funny books dropping this week that are keeping my sanity afloat.
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DC Comics Is Named One Of America’s Hottest Brands. Well Done, ‘New 52’.
Whatever misgivings I have with the DC Reboot-Relaunch-Refried Beans, it’s a success. The company is crushing it in sales (though I’m sure Economist Wizards have found ways to dismiss this, frankly numbers are above my head), and they’ve also been named one of My Country Tis Of Me’s hottest brands.
Variant Covers: Wolverine’s Vomiting Apple Pie On Grandpa
Gobble, gobble, gobble! How’s it going? We’re getting ready to celebrate LOL Sucker Indians Day! You know the one I talk about! We show thanks for everything by generally behaving like we really don’t appreciate anything. Packing in an inordinate amount of food, telling Uncle Steve he better pass that fucking drum stick, and then smashing Old Ladies in the nose for a good Black Friday deal.
Makes the human spirit sing!
Thankfully we have mofuckin’ comic books to hide within. Crack the spine, it shall provide an escape.
What are you reading this week?
Image Comics Announces ‘Image Expo’ In February.
Image Comics is throwing its chips into the convention circuit with their own being hosted next February. Even though it’s hosted in Oakland – get your own police ass-whupping for a limited fee! – its enticing. The creators line-up is pretty beast.
‘The Dark Knight Rises’ Graces Empire Magazine With Two Covers. Bat-Schwing.
Empire Magazine is apparently swinging out with a The Dark Knight Rises story, and the covers to the magazine have leaked. Fuck, sometimes I forget how much I’m sweating this movie.
Brandon Graham’s ‘King City’ Getting Collected By Image. Hells Yes.
I’ve begun the process of textually-fellating Brandon Graham around these parts, and I ain’t stopping. Not if my girlfriend comes in, not if I’m censured, censored, whatever! Finally, finally my prayers are being answered. I’m getting a unicorn for Christmas. Oh, and there’s more! Graham’s King City is getting collected.
Variant Covers: Hulk Smash Puny Pencilers.
In the dismal dusk that accompanies every earlier falling light comes the opportunity to snuggle up with a comic book. Pull the blankets over yourself, dust the Chez-It crumbs off your chest and get your funnies on. As the Earth tilts slightly, ever so slightly, the temperature here on the Eastern seaboard dips. Not even climate change can prevent that. With the dip and the tilt comes the desire to over-analyze panels of Iron Man’s remarkably phallic repulsor rays rocketing off Thor’s chiseled chest. By myself. With you. Don’t matter.
Variant Covers. My pull-list for the week.
Chris Claremont Donates His Archives To Columbia. X-Cellent Move. (LOL PUN.)
Chris Claremont more than likely penned your favorite issue of Uncanny X-Men. Unless your favorite issue is one from the Grant Morrison mind-boggling wunder-run. The good sir crafted most of the tales we’ve come to acknowledge as essential X-reading, and now he’s donating his archives to Columbia.
Jim Lee’s ‘Darkeseid’ Is Revealed. NOT ENOUGH CHITIN ARMOR.
Unknown to me, Darkseid is going to be the main villain in the Johns/Lee Justice League reboot. Would you like to see Lee’s design?
Hit the jump!
