I’m not watching this clip. Intentionally. The Captain America: The Winter Soldier hype-train is about to kick it up into insane-overdrive with the movie less than a month away. I get it. However I’d like to leave some sacred ground for my first viewing. HOWEVER SHARING IS CARING unless it’s herpes than it’s crying like masturbating but hey live and learn. So if you’re interested, hit the jump.

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Truthfully, I’m at work. So I managed to watch like nine seconds of this before I had to turn it off. Sound issues and all that fucking jumbo donkey feces. But I did manage to see Fury being like LOLWTF I’M ABOUT TO GET FUCKED. And then Winter Soldier is like BURN BRO.

It seems neat.

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Hey it’s a new poster for The Winter Soldier. In case you missed the last podcast (hey! look at this!) I’m pretty excited for this movie. So I’m just going to gobble up the fecal-blasts from the brown-coated entertainment wind tunnel that is Marvel’s Marketing Arm. Yum, yum! A distended belly full of nonsense and whizbang!

If you actually care about this poster, hit the jump. Let’s laugh at it together.

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Awww yeah, Cap! You take that mask off for me! Hunka hunka burning Patriotism. Seriously though. Thirty-seconds of Winter Soldier action right here. How much new stuff? Prolly pretty much like .0002 seconds. I dun care! It dun matter! Stoked.

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Gnarly as shit! Ed Brubaker is the writer behind The Winter Soldier. Dude came up with the storyline that shall serve as the centerpiece of the second Captain America flick. So it only seems both fair and righteous that the good sir has been granted a cameo in the flick. Where? That’ll come after the jump for you spoilerphobes. Know this, though: if you’ve seen the trailer, you’ve seen Brubaker already.

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Captain America: The Winter Soldier got an International Trailer. Smidgen of new footage. An added laugh. IDGAF, I’m smitten.

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Forgive the ridiculous title. I’m sorry! I have like 36,000 calories in me, caffeine rocketing around the guts like lightning! Viva America’s True Religious Holiday: Super Bowl Sunday! Anyways — holy fuck at this trailer. A truly gluttonous trailer for a truly gluttonous occasion. Too much awesome. Too many ridiculous moments. In a trailer.

I’m too excited for this movie.

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Another teaser for a Super Bowl trailer has dropped. Go figure! A teaser for a trailer. Go figure! It’s for a comic book movie. Needless snark aside may I just say — oh god I have an erection. An erection for fighting sleeper agent threats, dudes with flying backpacks, Chris Evans, and more.

Hit the jump for the teaser trailer…teaser.

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Well then! Winter Soldier ain’t dropped yet, but commerce and media production don’t balk at such things! The churn must churn, lest it not be…churning? Oh whatever. The minds behind Winter Soldier are coming back for Captain ‘Murica Round 3. And while I haven’t seen their first offering, if the trailers are any indication it’s going to blast the hair off my asshole with glee.

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I say goddamn yes! Let this be true. Peggy Carter was a gem in Captain America: Pump Him Full of Drugs Then He Can Pump Me. Unfortunately since Steve Rogers decided to go full fucking popsicle, it sort of purged what would be an Old As Fuck Peggy Carter from the MCU. However, there’s a way around that! A way around that!, true believers. A television show set in the past featuring her stellar goddamn adventures. Let this be true.

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