#August2014

‘Resident Evil 1’ getting remastered in HD. Coming 2015.

Resident Evil.

The original Resident Evil is getting a new coat of paint in 2015. Which I guess makes sense. If you’re Capcom and you’ve completely lost track of what made a franchise work, might as well go back to the original. Maybe study its workings while replastering the walls and apply that knowledge to Resident Evil 7 or whatever. You folks gonna buy this shit? I’m tempted.

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New ‘Mighty No. 9’ Gameplay Footage: It’s progressing mega well

Mighty No. 9!

Here’s some new footage from the upcoming Megaman Sequel Mighty No. 9 by the good creator of the Robot Boy himself. And goddamn, if it isn’t looking like everything we’d expect from a Megaman Sequel this spiritual successor. I’ll say it again — ya dun goofed, Capcom.

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OMEGA-LINKS: Agent Carter Roams The Moon!

FUCKING LINKS

Pinch my tits and call me an infidel! Another busy-as-fuck Monday, another complete lack of updates. But nary a worry is warranted, friends. Carry your trough up to the table and I’ll fill your little receptacle with the bullshit that got marked “saved for later” today, and the “later” never came.

Including! Agent Carter, those Comcast fuckers, Grant Morrison, the wonderful Police State, and more!

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ABSURD: ‘RESIDENT EVIL’ composer is a fraud. Also may not be deaf as he claimed

Sick mane of hair.

Ridiculous news the last couple of days. For starters, the dude who “composed” the score for some prominent Capcom games turns out to have…not composed them. He was lauded at the time for crushing these soundtracks despite having gone deaf. Now the winds of truth have blown in, and it turns out the dude hired a ghostwriter for the scores. Oh, and he may not be deaf.

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Keiji Inafune making SPIRITUAL SUCCESSOR to ‘MEGA MAN’ called ‘MIGHTY NO. 9’; needs us to KICKSTART THIS BEAST

Mighty No. 9.

Keiji Inafune is leaning on us to help him out. Why should we lend a hand? The dude only created Mega Man. Now he wants to launch the spiritual successor to his iconic franchise, and it goes by the name of Mighty No. 9. The only problem? Dude needs like a solid milli. Milli buckos to get this fucker off the ground.

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DmC: When Angels Die and Fanboys Cry

dante

It’s perhaps only in retrospect that we can see just how contemporary Devil May Cry was upon its release in 2001. The frantic, accelerated combat mechanics represented an industry pushing hardware to have games play as we’d so often wished they would. It was fast, brutal and responsive. It also introduced the series’ main protagonist, Dante, into the gaming public’s consciousness. This smart-assed, pizza-loving, sharp-dressing demon hunter went on to become the archetypical ‘cool’ video game hero. Fuelled by perceptions of the contemporary taken directly from the worlds of Anime and perceived notions of western ‘cool’: Dante was a product of his time and being contemporary was his nature. So, what happens when your contemporary character isn’t quite so cutting edge any longer? You reinvent him, of course.

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Press Start: British Turkey God Edition

I’ve not slept much this week. I’ve been consumed by thoughts of an imagined reality. I’ve been filling in the gaps, if you will: fleshing-out video game lore with some disturbing possibilities. Imagine the horror of being an animal trapped inside one of Dr. Robotnik’s murderous cybernetic shells: trained upon killing your only potential savior and being powerless to stop yourself. You try to resist, but the mechanical death-suit overpowers you: contorting and forcing your limbs into committing unspeakable acts.

You gaze downwards in horror at your blood-washed metallic hands: feeding tubes sustain your existence and damn you to a perpetual waking nightmare. As you gaze in horror at Sonic’s desecrated entrails, the suit gives you just long enough to truly absorb the horror of it all, then it contorts your limbs once again: wrenching your frail body towards an even darker purpose. Now you know that your family will die at your own hand.

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Chew your own face off: It’s Resident Evil 6

Whether it be good or bad, Resident Evil 6 is getting written about and talked about a whole lot. Every gaming website seems to be running a ‘best bit of a bad game feature’ or a condescending guide on how you’re playing it wrong, all just to keep that sweet advertising revenue rolling in and make sure they avoid another Jeff Gerstmann situation. That said, review scores have hardly been kind to the latest installment of the Resident Evil series and it isn’t hard to see why. Read the rest of this entry »

‘STREET FIGHTER’ producer Yoshinori Ono helping with the combat in ‘REMEMBER ME’, hell yes.

As if I couldn’t get any more jazzed for Remember Me, the game is getting a titan to consult. Street Fighter producer and uber-legend Yoshinori Ono is helping with the combat system. Yus.

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Capcom and Dontnod’s ‘REMEMBER ME’ OFFICIAL TRAILER: Cyberpunk Inception Orgy.

Hell yeah! Capcom is teaming up with developer Dontnod to hang this fucking gem upside my head. Take a total nerd-spot milking cyberpunk environment, throw in some overwrought Inception pandering. Mix it with a gorgeous battle system and cover system. Watch Caff-Pow writhe.

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