And you thought last week was slow. With Drive Angry 3D one week away, we’re hitting some sloooow news pockets here at Cage Match. Hopefully things pick up – I’m sure there will be a slew of interviews and such for DA next week. I’ll be interviewing him in my miiiiiind.

But I never come to Cage Match empty handed, folks. I suppose I would have this week if it wasn’t for my beautiful and talent fiance. For Valentine’s Day, she painted me the above homage to Bad Lieutenant. This is the greatest VD gift ever and is now proudly hanging in Cage Match Headquarters.

Prepare your minds and assholes next week for the OL Drive Angry Circle Jerk! Or just my review, whatevs.

Hello there. My name’s Patrick and I’m new here. The Brothers Omega have been retarded generous enough to offer me a position at their site, so here I am. I haven’t read a comic book in five years and don’t own a single video game system. Therefore, all I will be writing about is Nic Cage. Your prayers have been answered.

This is the premiere edition of CAGE MATCH – a weekly column where I fill you (yes, you) in on everything that happened in the past week in the world of Cage. So strap in, dorks. Time to read up on what really matters in life: CAGE!

Another Season of the Witch Trailer, Release Date Finally Announced

Over a year ago I was visiting my parents in New Jersey and we went to the movies. On the outside the theater was a HUGE banner for Season of the Witch. My face exploded. It was a 90 foot Nic Cage decked out in medieval gear and it said “coming soon.” Some preview screenings were held in December of 2009 but then the movie was dropped by its distributor and fell off the face of the planet. Now the bitch has been picked up by the folks at Rogue Pictures and will be released on January 7, 2011. Huzzah.

Cage stars as Behmen, a 14th century crusader who returns to his homeland to find everyone losing their shit over the Black Death. He’s assigned the mission of bringing a girl accused of causing the plague to a monastery where some monks will perform a ritual supposed to drive away the sickness. That probably means they’re going to rape her or something. Not on Cage’s watch, you old religious farts! This looks seriously awesome.

More Cage news after the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »