#September2012

Scientists make monkeys smarter with BRAIN IMPLANTS. We have learned…nothing.

Didn’t these fucking scientists see Rise of James Franco’s Wild Fucking Apes? Sure, sure. Give these monkeys brain implants. Next thing you know we’re all going to have our faces eaten off as the Great Culling of 2013 unleashes itself upon the world. Shit. Don’t say we didn’t have it coming, I guess.

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SPINAL FLUID To Power Human BRAIN IMPLANTS? The Future Is Good.

The wonky motherfuckers at MIT have struck once more. Everyone knows that brain implants granting the human flesh telekinesis and flight are right around the corner. What is going to power these reality-bending wunder machines? Obviously spinal fluid.

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