#July2015
‘Borderlands’ franchise director leaving Gearbox
The Exodus of High Profile Franchise directors continues. Borderlands is the latest series to loose their Hive-Mind Figurehead.
Cosplay: Mad Moxxi from ‘Borderlands’ will always hold my attention
I will never not post Mad Moxxi cosplay. That’s, that’s just the way it’s going to be. Forever.
Cosplay: Rule 63 Handsome Jack from ‘Borderlands’ got me feeling things
If I’m going to get back into the cosplay-posting-game, I suppose it makes sense to bring in two of my favorite things. Borderlands and Handsome Jack. (And yes, extremely pretty people.)
No Duh: ‘Borderlands 3’ happening, being made exclusively for next-gen
Borderlands! My fucking favorite. And this really isn’t news per say, but I’m going to be excited about Randy Pitchford confirming that Borderlands 3 is really happening. Like duh! But let my dong go swole.
‘Borderlands’ Non-News: Gearbox recruiting for the next game
Listen. If I can cop to Star Wars non-news, I can admit that this shit is not news as well. But I fucking love Borderlands, and I want a proper third installment almost as badly as I want a fourth Fucking Fallout (and Mass Effect).
Monday Morning Commute: nanobot-induced autoerotics
If there was one thing Grandpa was good for at Thanksgiving, it was sniffing a legion of nanobots before sitting down at the dinner table. There was an inevitable moment during the passing of the animal-flesh and the smashed-starches where his slackened, tired jaw would clench-up. Science retrieving something scattered decades ago by the natural progression of his Meat Case. Somewhere between that third fucking scoop of potatoes his eyes would dilate. His neck would kink. And as he tried to keep his hands from jittering upon the wooden offering-plank, a barely audible moan would escape them cracked lips.
“Oooh, the potatoes” he would murmur. False teeth clacking. “Ohhh, this turkey. Th-the gravy” he would gasp. We tried not to stare. When you’re one-hundred and thirty-four you write your own rules. None of us said a word, but we all knew the goddamn truth. That withered one man’s dick was titillated. An orgy of chemicals in his veins, an orgy of nanobots in his balls prodding his phallus into a seemingly-impossible climax.
Goddamn Grandpa and his goddamn nanobot-induced autoerotics.
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This is Monday Morning Commute. Share what you’re up to this week.
Cosplay: Two Mad Moxxis from Borderlands, One Image
One Mad Moxxi is typically too much for me to handle. But two? C’mon, yo. Now you’re simply not playing fair.
‘BORDERLANDS’ SEQUEL COMING; titled ‘THE PRE-SEQUEL!’
Fucking shit, man. Looks like I’m going to have to keep my PS3 hooked up just that much longer. Though to be truthful I’ve been rocking the shit out of it lately anyways. You see, there’s a goddamn Borderlands sequel dropping for the last-gen. Actually, it’s a prequel. But it’s uh, also a sequel. A pre-sequel.
New ‘BORDERLANDS’ GAME coming from TELLTALE GAMES
There’s a new Borderlands game coming! You’d imagine me covered in my own fluids, sad dinky pointing towards the sky, screaming in glory! Well…Well…I’m actually a bit ambivalent.
