Oh yeah! Wait — that Marvel: Assembling The Universes and Shit special was on tonight? On ABC? I didn’t catch it. Forgot. Thankfully for my ass, every fucking website is posting the concept art that Marvel revealed during it. There’s some dope stuff within, but I’m pretty sure everyone is just going to be stroking, slapping, or rubbing it to one piece of art in particular. Tony Stark’s Hulkbuster armor going head to head with the Hulk. Goddamn. Hulkbuster. Boner. Hulkbuster. Say it again, baby. Hulkbuster.

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I am not familiar with Kim Soo Hyun, but soon all the fanboys in the world such as myself shall be quite acquainted. The actress has been cast in Avengers 2: Age of James Spade. And more interestingly, Marvel ain’t talking about her role. MUCH INTRIGUE.

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Harumph! The sound I make when I’m unsure of something. It’s also the sound I make when I’ve just…you know what never mind I was going to mention something about masturbation, a bar of soap, and police sirens. Whatever. That’s not the story here. (Is it?) We’re talking Avengers: Age of Ultron.

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Combining both of these non-news news reports into one Titanic Machination of Non-News. Why? ‘Cause I cannot wait for 2015. It’s going to have HUGE, HUGE fucking RAMIFICATIONS on my life. No! Not my marriage, you idiots. (Thought that’s happening. 6.6.2015. Write it down, boners.) Instead, two of the biggest movies I’ve ever sweated are dropping.

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Vision is coming to the Marvel movie universe. By way of Jarvis. Whelp. Looks like the whole Jarvis-goes-Vision-somehow-creates Ultron storyline is gaining plausibility.

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Caps lock means excitement! Caps lock means excitement! Except for when I always use it, which pretty much denigrates it down into utter worthlessness. Anyways fuck me, fuck caps lock, fuck whatever. We’re here to talk Avengers: Age of Ultron casting.

Ya heard?

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2013 was a bit of a benchmark year for me in the realm of my personal life. Over the course of the last twelve months I have: successfully not shit my pants (time left), moved into my first official apartment with my girlfriend (I was squatting in hers), spent hundreds of dollars on caffeinated products, proposed to said girlfriend and begun planning a wedding, played far too many hours of Borderlands 2, stared at far too many asses on Tumblr, taught my first classes (I love it), and hung with the Gang Omega far too little.

The drawback of a boomin’ personal life is that pop culture has flowed through my brain with far too little interaction this year. What I perceive, I half perceive. What I enjoy is fleeting. Worse still, I’ve ventured very little out of my comfort zone. Indie games, comics, movies, and fetish sites have been largely ignored due to want of time.

As a result, my list is a pedestrian collection of my favorites from a very sad little slice of what arrived onto the scene this past calendar year.

Excelsior.

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Hail! The second villain for Avengers 2: War Machine is Killed By Tony’s Tech has been revealed.  The aforementioned villain’s reveal is courtesy of a casting call making the rounds.

Hit the jump for the deets.

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Don Cheadle is going to be in Avengers: Age of Ultron. He’s playing a “key role” in the flick. Now listen I’m not a genius and I wouldn’t bet (my own) money on this theory. But. This is my idea. I see no better way to have Tony don the armor again than having Ultron kill Rhodey with Stark’s own technology. I mean…right?

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Filed under: things we already knew. What Taylor-Johnson confirmed months ago, is uh, confirmed by other people and stuff.

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