‘The Mandalorian’ star Pedro Pascal cast as Joel in ‘The Last Of Us’ HBO TV series. Hell yeah, this is the way, blah blah!
Holy fuck. The Mandalorian‘s own Pedro Pascal has been cast as Joel in the HBO TV adaptation of The Last of Us.
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China’s Tianwen-1 has successfully entered orbit around Mars. Hell yeah, fellas!
China’s Tianwen-1 has successfully entered orbit around Mars, motherfuckers! As I always say: I know China is problematic as fuck. But if we’re only rooting for space missions tethered to non-problematic countries or companies, we’re never going to be rooting. So fuck yes. I’m stoked.
‘Ted Lasso’ Season 2 is going to have two more episodes than the first. This feels very, very good.
Ted Lasso is a fucking gem, and if I haven’t convinced you to watch it yet…kiss my ass! Nah, I love you all the same. But this is great news for stans of the series like me. The second season is gonna have two more episodes than its first. Good, good! Give me all the feel good! Good, good, give me all the Lasso!
‘Cyberpunk 2077’ studio has been victim of cyberattack but ain’t giving in to ransom demands.
Man, CD Projekt Red can’t catch a fucking break. Granted, most of their suffering has been of their doing. But now they’ve been goddamn hacked, and the hackers are demanding a ransom. If they ain’t paid, they’ve threatened to drop the source code for The Witcher 3 and Cyberpunk 2077. I say, goddamn.
‘The Falcon and the Winter Soldier’ Super Bowl Trailer: Buddy Cop Time, Baby!
Despite Bucky being near and dear to my heart, I wasn’t taken with the first trailer for The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. But fuck me! This Super Bowl trailer? Has me torqued, baby!
Monday Morning Commute: Lord Knows I’m Tired
As our own Neo said to me today, lately my ass definitely sounds “kinda burned for this early in the semester” and he ain’t wrong. I don’t know, man! Fucking snow! Fucking gray skies! Fucking remote teaching! It’s all just a lot, and every day survived feels like a small victory. There’s sludge in the brain! Mud in the blood! My synaptic cycling is definitely more slowed than preferred.
Eh! Fuck it, right? I mean, I don’t know what to do.
Keep moving! Keep going! Push forward.
I’m just grousing, but I’m here! Which has to count for something, right? Please tell me yes. Just lie, if need be. I need it.
Meanwhile, despite my gloom, I’m enjoying my fair share of commodities and consumerist models. So I’m gonna share these oddities, commodities, and various arts & farts with ya’ll. Then, I hope you’ll decide to join me in the comments section.
Let’s fucking go!
This is Monday Morning Commute.
NATO Chief wants fucking military tanks to have solar panels. This is how ‘Horizon: Zero Dawn’ started, you dildos!
Hey! Yeah! Give military tanks solar panels, you dildos! Then, pop in a functional AI for targeting. Then, kiss your ass goodbye! We are so, so horny for the fucking Robotapocalypse.
Weekend Open Bar: The Saints Can’t Save You
The Saints can’t save you, motherfuckers! Nor can the Trees, or the Ones Who Walk Behind The Shadows. However, you can absolutely save your fucking self. It’s within you, it’s within your guts, it’s within your marrow. Is it easy? Nah! Is it guaranteed? Nah! But, it’s a promise at the end of a dank tunnel. What does salvation look like, for me? Acknowledging that I have control over my circumstances. Self-care. And! Hanging out with you fuckers! Hey, look at that. A poorly-stuck segue into this here fucking column! However, I ain’t completely full of shit.
Salvation comes in the form of community, the creation of bonds, the spending of our entropic-distillation together. Shiny baubles and distractions are fantastic, but just fucking broing out with you legion of degenerates is more enjoyable than anything else.
So come hither, you fellow slime. Let’s spend the weekend together at the Open Bar!
Watch: David Fincher directed a Super Bowl commercial scored by Atticus Ross. I can’t pass this shit up
Well, it’s certainly not fucking Mindhunter. But, I’ll enjoy this Super Bowl commercial by David Fincher and Atticus Ross all the same. (Fucking hell, I fucking need more Mindhunter. Stop fucking off, Fincher.)
‘Spider-Man 3’ is the “most ambitious standalone superhero movie ever” according to Tom Holland. Spider-Verse like a mofuckah, huh?
Tom Holland has tickled our tips with this glorious tease about Spider-Man 3. Dude says it’s the most ambitious superhero standalone film ever. Which to me, obviously, means we’re getting that fucking Spider-Verse. I mean, right? As well, I don’t mean to get into semantics, but shit like Spider-Man 3 and Captain America: Civil War definitely push the definition of “standalone” movie. Like, c’mon now.
