Warner Bros. strikes first deal to bring films to theaters only in 2022. Includes new 45-day window!
It looks like the fucks at Warner Brothers are making good on their claim that 2021 is an aberration in their release policy. Unlike this year, the company has struck a deal with Regal Cinemas to be dropping new titles in theaters only in 2022. However, they’ve also negotiated a 45-day window, which is noticeably shorter. Me? I’m fucking stoked, man. Preserve the theatrical experience, and if the theaters aren’t ready by 2022, we got bigger fucking problems.
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Microsoft has rebranded Xbox Live as Xbox Network for dumb and silly reasons!
Listen, at the end of the day I don’t give two flying fucks about what Xbox Live is called. Is that because I’m always going to call it Xbox Live? Yup! But if you’re concerned about accuracy, motherfucker, it’s called Xbox Network now. K!
Young female Twitter star turns out to be 50 year-old Japanese biker using deepfakes. The future is absolutely fucking wild.
We’re all living within a Billy Gibson novel, my dudes. A Young female Twitter has revealed herself to be a fucking 50 year-old Japanese biker. Man, just drink in that fucking sentence. Tremendous. Dude convinced everyone using deepfakes, and fucking hell do I love this.
Keanu Reeves starring in movie adaptation of his comic ‘BRZRKR’ for Netflix! Anime series coming, too!
Well, this was inevitable, but it’s still fucking awesome. Netflix is adapting Keanu Reeves’s comic book BRZRKR into a live-action movie, and obviously the dude is starring. But wait, there’s more! The comic is also getting an anime series on the streaming motherfucking giant!
Monday Morning Commute: (Can’t Wait To) Take This Damn Mask Off!
Can’t wait to take my fucking mask off, friends! Like, I get that it isn’t going to happen anytime soon. Maybe the end of 2021? But it feels more and more real with each passing day. You know? Here in the greatest state in the union they’re opening up vaccine eligibility to all starting April 19, and I’m fucking torqued. Gonna work them sign-up sites like I’m hunting for a goddamn PlayStation 5. I’m also hoping that I’ll have more success getting a vaccine appointment than everyone is having getting that fucking console. ‘Cause mamma mia, are PS5s hard to come by these days.
With the impending access to a vaccine, the sunny days, and the progression of the semester, I’m feeling good. Who knows if the vibe will last, but I’m just riding it right now. Why not, right?
So let’s hang out here together, my dudes! My friends! My comrades! Right here in the newest edition of Monday Morning Commute. What are you doing this week? What are you digging this week? I want to know! But first, I’ll show!
Scientists drop telescope into world’s deepest lake to hunt for dark matter. I don’t understand, but I’m aroused!
Yeah, listen. I’m a barely functioning fucking composition teacher, so it stands to reach this don’t make sense to me. Like, dumping a telescope into the world’s deepest lake? To hunt for dark matter? Nope, don’t fucking get it! But I’m into it, motherfuckers. You do you thing. Find some neutrinos for us, okay?
‘Gotham Knights’ has been delayed until 2022. This year is for gaming backlogs, friends!
Motherfucking backlogs are the stars of 2021, fellas! ‘Cause game after game is getting delayed! The most recent? Gotham Knights! I don’t blame the motherfuckers doing the delaying. I can only that developing titles during a pandemic is a straight pain in the ass. So while this shit sucks, it’ll let me polish off the, like, thirty titles I’m halfway into.
Weekend Open Bar: Are You Ready?
Are you ready? Whole squad’s ready! Forgive me from quoting the tune from The Falcon and the Winter Soldier’s Super Bowl trailer! I’m just so fucking pumped for this shit! As I’ve probably puked-up many times around these parts, Bucky is my favorite motherfucker in the MCU! Just an absolute unit of brooding, healthy male bonding, and gorgeous hair. How can you not love this motherfucker! It’s impossible, and now this son of a bitch is getting a co-starring role in the latest dollop of dashing MCU madness.
Scientists have finally measured the size of Mars’ core. Shit is less dense than thought!
We finally know the size of Mars’ core, motherfuckers! This is thanks to Astronomy-Wizards and through the measuring of seismic activity, both of which are pretty impressive. What have we found, now that we’ve measured the core? It’s less dense than we thought! Yeah, I said we! As a human, I want in on this shit. Sitting here. In joggers. Farting. Staring at butts. This is it! This is my moment.
Views From The Space-Ship: Oh Hell Yeah!
Yo! Remember Views From The Space-Ship aka Desktop Thursdays aka Views From The Space-Ship? And back? And forth? Well, I figured it may be fun to rekindle the column! Back in the day, it was your weekly look into my world(s), be it digital and physical! As well, it was my (and others) opportunity to check-in on views from your lives!
