#Welcome To the Future
WINKLEVOSS TWINS own 1 PERCENT of all Bitcoin. That’s uh, neat guys.
Those guys who hired Jesse Eisenburger to create Face-Book in that movie are trying their hardest to be relevant. Sure they didn’t get to own the Harvard Face-Space, but they own a considerable amount of Bitcoin! Listen, don’t get me wrong. Bitcoin is cool. However, this smacks like that time my Dad bought me an Atari when all I wanted was a fucking Nintendo.
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CISPA passes committee, the old BIG BROTHER INTERNET BILL heads to the House floor.
In case you’re wondering, friends: your dumb fucking privacy and freedom are never going to be worth more than money oozing out of the tentacles of lobbyists.
RUSSIAN BEARS are addicted to HUFFING JET FUEL. It just got real.
I can’t blame Russian bears for resorting to huffing jet fuel. It isn’t spoken of much, but historians agree that they took the dissolution of the USSR the worst. Not only did they agree with Marx-Engels ideals of Communism, but they also trudged on fighting in favor of the its contorted interpretation by the Russian Nationalists despite their reservations.
BRAIN-TO-BRAIN interface is real. WALTER BISHOP STYLEE.
We have connected two brains, folks. Some real-up science-fiction nightmare shit. It’s real. Really real!
ANONYMOUS hacks North Korea’s TWITTER and FLICKER. Legion, et cetera.
Anonymous has gone after none other than North Korea in their latest hacking fiasco. They’re all like, running amok and leaving wonky pictures and the such. Careful bros and brodettes, this is the sort of chicanery that has you end up in some hole somewhere.
Here’s EARTH courtesy of the first WEATHER SATELLITE picture from 53 years-ago.
Yo, I don’t even know. This picture is making the rounds on the Internet today, and I want to be like everyone else. Truthfully though, it’s a pretty ballin’ picture. That’s what the hip kids say these days. Balling! Hit the jump to check it out. Or don’t. Just stay here and bask in the glory of Will Smith. Sucking on that big brown lit-phallus. Dude has it figured out.
NYU STUDENT creates gel that stops bleeding instantly. MEDI-GEL GET.
I knew that Mass Effect was true. I just knew it. All those letters I have sent to Shepard care of The Citadel haven’t been in vain. Knew it, knew it! You doubt me? Check this fresh shit out. A college student has created a gel that stops bleeding instantly. Just like medi-gel, yo! Now we must prepare for the Reapers. You with me?
Google Chrome experiment turns websites into a game of ‘MARBLE MADNESS.’
Here is a new use for Omega Level. There is a little Google Chrome gadgetry that turns websites into playable games of Marble Madness. Boot that shit up on OL, and navigate the latex cosplay in ways you never would have anticipated.
Dudes use CASINO’S OWN CCTVS to score $32 million. Danny Ocean smirks.
Ain’t this a hell of a subversion. Everyone knows The Man & Illuminati use CCTVs to pacify the public. With their ubiquitous presence, the cameras watch us as we wank. They watch as we stroll through public parks. They watch us all the time. Well, they can also be hacked. Such a hackery went down at a casino, and those involved netted a serious amount of cheddar. Sure, they have probably been chopped up. Fed to dogs. But they get my respect.
First GOOGLE FIBER expansion announced. GET INSIDE ME.
I am not saying that sometimes I whisper ill-coated words at my modem. I’m just saying sometimes I spit hate upon it, raining on it phrases such as “You overpriced piece of shit. You slack-jawed son of a bitch. Just wait, just wait until The Googler Arrives. Then I’m throwing you right in the snow.” Smugly, the modem refuses to answer. It is an arrogant piece of plastic. However, maybe it doesn’t feel comfortable today. The Googler has announced the first major expansion of its Fiber Service.
