[WEEKEND OPEN BAR: The one-stop ramble-about-anything weekend post at OL. Share your plans for the weekend. Tell us how drunk you are. Describe a comic you bought. This is your chance to bring the party. Drop a dumb GIF you found.]

Why hello, Friday. Pleasure to see you. How are all you folks doing? It’s the first Weekend Open Bar in a while. You know the rules. Pull up a soda, beer, hard liquor, and a dashing helping of pretzels. And thank talk among yourselves. What’s good this weekend?

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I don’t know enough about them there bio-technological-wizardry to fully understand this article. Thankfully, sometimes this allows me an advantage. For example: this article is really blowing away my fat headed simian synapses.

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This seems too dope to be true. Can the Hyperloop truly be more than the interesting imaginings of a Rich as Fuck and Also Curious Dude and his team of designers? Can it?! I want to zip around at 800 mph, via magnetic levitation.

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Well isn’t this neat! Ain’t nothing like being in the middle of a protest, or you know, a Nickleback concert when all of a sudden The Man shuts down your ability to document something very gnarly. Like all ill-nasty Chad Kroeger solo. Right? I mean, that’s all we have to worry about.

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Ah, my fluid-covered copy of Neuromancer loves this development. A US District Court Judge Person said that Bitcoin can be used as actual money. Naw I’m not really sure about all the legalese behind it, I just know that this is the future that Max Headroom promised me.

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My fetish with cyberpunk demands that I eat lab meat at least once in my life. With the way things are progressing on the Blue Marble, I imagine I may be “enjoying” this luxury sooner than later. I mean shit — some lab meat was mowed upon just today!

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I’m a beaten man when it comes to this sort of nonsense. Yesterday’s Megaton Bomb was the Megaton Bomb that anyone with a subtle sense of what is going on in this world already knew: the NSA pretty much collects everything about all of us. The only solution? Continue plummeting down the rabbit hole into furry-scat-vomit porn and fiction, attempting to at least shock them. Though I know with resignation that I am not a unique snowflake, and there are lots of Me out there.

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Don’t blame me, I just wanted to reference Rust In Peace. Chinese Hackers have totally traversed the Metaverse, snagged the Golden Bauble from our DOJ hives, and returned him as victorious warriors. Of course, that’s what I imagine it all going down. I’m probably completely incorrect.

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Amazon is going to begin publishing fanfiction through Kindle Worlds, which is an offshoot of their self-publishing arm. I don’t write fanfiction, though I do appreciate both its authors and the idea of it. So I don’t know if I’m the best one to weigh in on this shit, so I will stae that I like the idea of these talented folk being recognized. Or not recognized. You know, based on the quality of their work.

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NASA is funding a 3D food printer, folks. Coupled with dietary experts from’Murica, the aim is to get cheese poofs and pizza into the gullets of astronauts. And eventually the world. (This is actually all sorts of amazing.)

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