#Star Wars
‘EPISODE VII’ News: Lupita Nyong’o and Gwendoline Christie join cast
An Oscar winner and fucking Brienne of Tarth have joined Episode VII. I understand I stroke it to Wampa porn and worship at the altar of the Force, so I may be biased. But I’m losing my fucking mind over this cast.
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‘GODZILLA’ director GARETH EDWARDS helming first ‘STAR WARS’ STANDALONE FLICK
HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO BUY A ROTISSERIE CHICKEN AT STOP & SHOP WITH NEWS LIKE THIS BREAKING? One minute I leave the house. Then I’m on my phone AND STAR WARS-SHIT IS BLOWING UP. Had to punch an old lady in the kidney to get through the doors faster. FART IN A FUCKING LITTLE KID’S FACE to cut the self-checkout. But here I am. Telling you this: Gareth Edwards is in charge of the first Star Wars movie. NOW CAN I COOK MY FUCKING BROCCOLI? Edwards? Love or hate Godzilla, he has a gorgeous eye. The writer for this standalone flick? Fucking gross.
‘EPISODE VII’ Video: New alien revealed, help children, physical set locations
Okay let’s not be classless and focus on what society totally tells us is the most important part about this video okay okay okay. There’s an opportunity for us all to donate to Star Wars: Force For Change and receive a variety of rewards. But we’ll do it for humanity. Right? Right! OKAYFUCK. Now can I talk about how awesome it is that S7ar Wars is shooting on real sets? And using physical models like we see for its creatures? Am I allowed? FUCK. I’M EXCITED. See it for yourself.
‘RED FIVE’ could be ‘STAR WARS’ standalone flick
If you believe the rumor mill, Red Five could be an upcoming Star Wars standalone flick. My question though — how would this work? Hamill is old as fuck, and I can’t imagine that they’d cast him in a standalone. Recast the Skywalker? Daring. How about — let me dream — this is an animated flick? Pixar? Let me dream, assholes.
First “EPISODE VII’ photo released as filming begins
YeahokayIknowthisisntreallyafuckingphotofromthemoviepersay. But hey, I’m a Star Wars fanboy, and you’re on my site. I hope that either you’re down with the Force, or can at least accept me despite my flaws. ‘Cause I’m beautiful! And you’re beautiful! And here’s a photo! Acknowledging filming has begun! From Bad Robot’s Twitter.
‘STAR WARS: EPISODE VII’ TITLE REVEALED. MAYBE.
The working title for Star Wars: Episode VII may have been revealed. It may not have been. This is the Internet. Where everybody’s opinion doesn’t count, and no one is held accountable! Let’s play the game!
‘STAR WARS REBELS’ Trailer! Plus, Kenobi’s On The Show!
Yeah, I make no apologies. Watching this trailer for Star Wars Rebels had me smiling like the eternal twelve year-old that resides within this chunky thirty year-old husk! Plus, news regarding the series. Primarily that Old Ben Kenobi shall be present.
‘EPISODE VII’ CAST ANNOUNCED. MY NIPPLES HURT WITH GLEE.
Oh baby, my nipples are hurting. Nay. My nipples are leaking from excitement. The Episode VII cast has finally been announced, and it is stocked with a cavalcade of oldies and newbies that get me taut in all the applicable places.
CHEWBACCA relaxes with gnarly skateboarding techniques
A little Tuesday morning nonsense-zen.
‘EPISODE VII’ News: Oscar Isaac up for major role. Plus Ford has “gigantic” role. Uh?
Shit, I’ll level with you. Probably none of this is actually news. First up. Oscar Isaac is up for a “major role”, if theater commitments can be accommodated. Second up. Harrison Ford has a “gigantic role” in Episode VII. Yup –you’ve read that right. In the blackout that surrounds Episode VII, mentioning that HAN FUCKING SOLO has a BIG ROLE is news. Am I perpetuating it? Aye.
