#Slop Culture
Saved By The Bell: The Video Game? Zack Morris Goes ‘Earthbound’.
Saved By The Bell taught me a lot of things in life. Namely that life is perfect if you’re a wily high school student named Zack Morris, capable of synthesizing a Breakfast Club-esque allotment of dorks, jocks, nerds, and jocks. How did that actual alchemy occur? This imagined Saved By The Bell video game takes a stab at simulating it.
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Vonnegut Library To Give Away Free Copies Of Banned Book To Missouri Students. Awesome.
Remember a couple of days ago when I posted that a douche professor in Missouri managed to get Slaughterhouse-Five banned? Well the Kurt Vonnegut memorial library is willing to give away copies of the books. This is awesome.
Japanese Competitive Gamer Endorses A Laxative? Right On.
Kayo Satoh is awesome. She was born a boy, is now a female, and whups all sorts of ass in competitive gaming. She also kicks her rock up a level by being the first competitive gamer to…endorse a laxative. Outstanding.
Woman Drives Over Boyfriend Because He Cheated At A Video Game. Don’t Mess With Loot, Yo.
Behold the eyes of madness! This is Erin Slingsby, a lovely UK woman who ran the fuck over her boyfriend after a dispute involving a video game. Clearly this dude hasn’t encountered many ladies who play games, because I’ve learned one thing: don’t fuck with their loot.
[Video] Mayor of Vilnius, Lithuania Destroys Illegally Parked Cars With Tank. Yes.
The mayor of Vilnius, Lithuania serves up ownage sandwiches to illegally parked cars. Dude blows through them in a fucking tank, crushing them and leaving them for death. Outstanding.
Hit the jump for the video.
Missouri State Professor Gets Slaughterhouse-Five Banned In Local Schools.
Ah. There’d been a good amount of time since I heard the tale of some uppity dickbag or dickbagette who went and got a perfectly outstanding book banned from a school district. Perhaps it’s my liberal Northeastern upbringing, but I’m surprised this book was the latest casualty.
Slaughterhouse-Five? So it goes.
Monday Morning Commute: Rippin’ Sugar Packets
Welcome to the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE – OL’s weekly show-and-tell session. I’m going to give you a peek at some of the bits of entertainment that’ll keep me from swearing off our oppressive society, giving away all my worldly possessions, and then fleeing to the wilderness so I can die in a van.
After reading about the destinations of my entertainment-excursions, you’re encouraged to hit up the comments section so you can show off your own itinerary.
Let’s rock.
…ALSO?
On Friday night I was fortunate enough to catch a midnight screening of Pulp Fiction at the Somerville Theatre. Sure, getting a chance to see Tarantino’s seminal work on the big-screen was absolutely amazing. But what was truly mind-blowing was encountering the most puzzling statement I’ve ever seen scrawled on a bathroom stall:
I also love to fart on pussy.
With no other graffiti visible, my search for meaning became frantic. Who farts on pussy? Why? And what’s with the inclusion of also? This could imply either that the author loves to do other things on pussy or that he loves to fart on other things. Hrm. Is this some sort of Zen kÅan?
What does this mean?
Signed Copy of Mega Drive Tetris Going For $1 Million. Seller Hopes.
Behold a rare ass copy of Tetris. It is for the Mega Drive, and signed by Tetris’ creator. The seller is auctioning off the son of a bitch, and he’s hoping to loot a cool million dollars. Ah, to dream.
