#Slop Culture
The Meming of Life: Conspiracy Keanu
No one is better equipped to deal with snares and trappings of an infinitely complex world than Conspiracy Keanu. Since September of last year, he has been waging a war of truth against the cloak and dagger illuminati, exposing their secrets through his mind-bending theories. Beware: once you have seen into the mind of a genius, there is no return to normality. So sign your waivers, and check out the top 5 after the jump.
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Video: HOLOGRAM TUPAC Laying It Down At Coachella. The Future, Man.
Here’s HOLOGRAM TUPAC rising up out of the digital depths to perform at Coachella. Ridiculous. I’m glad to know that when I die, Rendar will have me walking around parties as a hologram, holocrapping and holoswearing.
CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve reached the end of the internet!
If you were expecting anything other than Ron Jeremy dressed as Mario, sorry to disappoint.
Video: It’s A Corgi Getting Vacuumed. Dude Is In F**king Heaven.
Happy Friday! Let’s turn the brains off more than usual with this adorable video of a corgi getting vacuumed and loving it.
The Meming of Life: Skateboarding Professor
Being a total sucka for memes, I thought I would introduce a new series celebrating popular memes as they pop, or just whenever I feel like talking about them. Aside from the fact that memes are google gold, my profound fascination goes much deeper than the cheap thrills of internet popularism. I think there is some intangible esoteric allure that great memes possess.
JIM LEE ON A CAMEL.
…’cause why not? Here’s Jim Lee rocking out on a fucking camel on New Year’s Eve in the late 1990s.
PIZZA HUT UK Has HOT DOG STUFFED CRUST. Schooling America At America
Pizza Hut UK is upping its fucking game, son! They’re outdoing us Americans at being slovenly Western pigs. Behold!, the hot dog stuffed crust pizza.
Hit the jump if you dare.
Monday Morning Commute: Katana Pubic Trimmer
Hello there, fellow worker bees! Are you already sick of the workweek? Don’t worry, you’re not alone! The way the Man has it set up, we’re all supposed to hate our Monday through Friday responsibilities, those tasks that we must complete so that we can earn currency to exchange for the electricity and beer and buffalo wings that we enjoy on the weekends.
It’s hardly an ideal system.
But fear not, for this right here is the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! I’m going to show you the various ways I’ll be thwarting the advances of that spirit-crushing behemoth commonly referred to as Workweek Ennui! After you check out my snake-oils, hit up the comments section and display your own wares.
Grab a Diet Fanta and jump on in!
Las Vegas Almost Had A LIFE-SIZED STARSHIP ENTERPRISE. So Close, Man.
Las Vegas almost had a Starship Enterprise sitting in its guts, to be seen from space and admired from afar. This son of a bitch was going to be almost as tall as the Eiffel fucking Tower, and would have given geeks across the globe groan-throb. Almost. That’s the key word. Direct the turd-filled socks to Stanley Jaffe for this project’s demise.
Vladimir Putin: Russian Has Microwave Mind Control Zombie Gun. Oh Vladdy
Vladimir Putin isn’t fucking around. You can tell that the Lord Emperor of Russian (and tiger kung-fu dominator) takes the USSR’s loss of the Cold War with a particularly chaffed ass. That leads him to dropping little nougats every once in a while about Russian rockitude. Take for example, the microwave zombie gun.
