I don’t mean to alarm anyone here, but sometimes I can sound like an old man bitching about how things today stink.  Usually I am aware of my behavior and I ham it up a little.  I like sounding like a bitter old man.  However today’s Opinions Vary is a very different beast.  I actually and truly believe the following.
—
I prefer practical special effects over digital effects.
—

Keep Reading »

In case you missed it, it was recently announced that Rocky: the Musical, the tuneful reimagining of the Oscar-winning film and current hit in Germany, will be coming to Broadway in the near future. A brainchild of none other than Sylvester Stallone, the production transports the classic boxing story from the screen to the stage, to a genre whose aim is to not only capture the eyes of the audience, but their ears as well (without the need to cast Mike Tyson). So American audiences will soon have the opportunity to do more than just cheer on their favorite all-American underdog; they will be able to sing along with the prized pugilist, lyric for mumbled lyric. Keep Reading »

This is the cold hard truth. Or should I say the squishy warm truth. At least once in our lives, we have filled our pants with brown yuck-yuck. Whether we are younglings, freshly emerged from our mother’s labia, or we are old as shit incontinent motherfuckers. At some point we have crapped our pants. Desperate waste has slithered down our legs, compiling itself into pile of reminder. A reminder of our body’s pathetic inefficiency.

Keep Reading »

… and pessimist’s brains are half empty.

There’s something to be said for choosing a side in most every battle.  The eternal struggle between optimism and pessimism however is one of those battlegrounds that I would always avoid.  You see dear reader, I am a realist.  I see the world and the people in it for what they are, not what I would hope those to be, like the optimist.  I don’t project my own values and bitterness on the world as does the pessimist.  However, before we delve further we must understand to two opposite sides of the spectrum if we are to find the creamy center.  And nougat.   Sweet delicious nougat.

Keep Reading »

I don’t think I am postulating anything profound when I say a major aim of criticism is to evaluate a piece of art in a way that is enlightening (if not slightly edifying), allowing the audience to not only experience a fresh perspective on the value and meaning of that work in question, but also offering them a chance to see what that critic values in meaningful art. A review is as much an assessment on the reviewer who views a work of art as it is a review of the work. Sure, it may be a secondary source to the piece and, by extension, inextricably connected to the thoughts of the artist who created it, but the work of criticism instantly becomes a primary source for that critic who has those thoughts on that artist and art piece. First and foremost, we learn what that critic is thinking when we read criticism, enabling us to get into that person’s mindset (and the better the criticism, the more we want to stay there, or take those thoughts with us).

Keep Reading »

To smash the face of your enemies is the most grand of human experiences. To drink their blood from the crystal chalice of your superiority is to achieve the pinnacle of Darwinian success. It is with this irrefutable notion in mind that I postulate the following: every fucking video game should have New Game+. Every digi-polygon experience should allow those of us who have rose up through the darkness of a Level 1, Devoid of Equipment birth to return to those who felled us at the beginning of our journey with fury. We deserve to smash their teeth with our litany of new abilities. We deserve it, god fucking dammit. We earned it.

Keep Reading »

You’re special. Doesn’t that feel good to hear? There is only one you in the whole, wide world. The feeling of being special is an innate function of the human psyche. Of course it comes in a million different shapes and forms, but our primal need to feel special drives much of the world as we know it. Today we are going to examine this phenomenon through my jaded little world-view, and see where it takes us. To be honest, I’m not exactly sure where this is going to go. But this is happening. Now.

Keep Reading »

What does that title have to do with that picture?  Nothing.  What does it have to do with this whole article?  I’ll get to that.  You see, this is my turn to helm the column Opinions Vary.  Today you’ll be stepping into my fun house to play with my magic mirrors.  Wipe your feet and keep your grubby hands off the glass..

I love to laugh.  Nothing makes me happier … literally.  What gives me a raging funny boner?  Random shit.  The more random, and more macabre (hence the title) the more I like it.  Even as a small child I was chastised for laughing or joking about horrible things.  I was met by the age old adage “There is a Time and a Place for Jokes.”  I agree with that statement, and here we get onto the crazy train that is my opinion.

The Time and Place for Laughing or Making Jokes are Always, and Everywhere!

Keep Reading »

Preamble.
When Eduardo Pluto first tasked me with writing this column, I was very much the-excite. I viewed it as an opportunity to pull apart my cheeks and bathe a litany of things in my steaming hate. It was a bona fide excuse to wield a hate-katana, slicing at the various things for which I held contempt. However, I began to waver in this task the more I thought about it. Slathering stupidity over a variety of topics in an effort to rile up the masses went against the very grain of OMEGA LEVEL, a site whose unofficial motto I’ve always felt was, “LIKING THINGS IS AWESOME.” So that’s not what I shall be doing here during my turn at Opinions Vary.

No, no it shant be.

Instead, I’m aiming to pump-up the pectorals of various things I enjoy. Specifically, the ones that have themselves been kicked in the pink goodies until they were mush. I’m going to prop the ground beef genitals of emaciated movies, books, video games, and sexual positions that I enjoy.

Strap in, and strap on. I’m about to blast your g-spot with positivity. When you’re done throwing rope, I’m going to kiss you upon the head and leave you be.

The first topic whose chest I’m going to rub with Hot&Cold?

The arts themselves.

Relax everyone, the arts are still beautiful.

Keep Reading »

If it isn’t already obvious, we here at Omega-Level are an assertive bunch, often to an outlandish degree. For both contributors and commenters, we like what we like, no matter how offbeat it may be, and we make sure that others know our likings, even if such views are potentially detrimental to our own pristine repute within the community and to the internet at large. When we must, we get opinionated about something because we think we get it better than anyone else. That conviction, for better or worse, is the modus operandi of our everyday goings-on here, and this new column aims to celebrate this dogged disposition.

Keep Reading »