#Movies
Rumor: NEW ‘THE MATRIX’ TRILOGY coming courtesy of Wachowskis. Just no.
The Wachowskis have spent the fifteen years since The Matrix generally sucking ass with some marginal gems (Speed Racer is fucking rad) in-between. With their latest disaster failure pile coming in the form of Jupiter Ascending (though truthfully I’m stoked for it) what are they to do? Go back to the Easy Idea.
And the Oscar Goes to the Omega-Level!
Have you ever watched the Oscars and said to yourself, “Gee, if only I had a chance to win my own trophy like those happy Oscar winners. That would really spice up my life—or at least make watching this protracted awards show a little bit more interesting.” Honestly, I don’t even know why I asked: I know you’ve thought this because I have thought the same thing and we Omega-Levellers think alike. It’s just how we roll; it’s what makes us us. Up until now, we have had no outlet to realize this dream, no real chance to shine in the spotlight. But then The Dude, always the innovator in our midst, came up with a brilliant idea to rectify this sorry state of affairs, one so simple and perfect and right for us: We should have our own Omega-Level Oscar award! And now that the Oscars air this Sunday, it’s time to unveil the competition for the inaugural (yes, I’m just going to assume there will be many, many more after this) Best Oscar-Picker award! Hit the jump if you want a piece of some OL Oscar glory.
Patrick Wilson Joins ‘ANT-MAN’, can’t possibly be worse than his other comic movie
Patrick Wilson was Owl-Guy in Zack Snyder’s fetishistic, slow-motion driven, intellectually challenged rendition of Watchermen. Now he’s back to the comic book stable, joining the cast of Ant-Man.
‘AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON’ SNEAK PEAK dropping in MARCH on ABC
Harumph! The sound I make when I’m unsure of something. It’s also the sound I make when I’ve just…you know what never mind I was going to mention something about masturbation, a bar of soap, and police sirens. Whatever. That’s not the story here. (Is it?) We’re talking Avengers: Age of Ultron.
Patrick Cooper wants to take us to ‘VIOLENCE HIGH.’ Dope Film Analysis++
Friend of the site — nay! — friend of the Brothers Omega in general Patrick Cooper is undertaking a pretty gnarly task. Said Cooper wants to analyze how “real-life tragedies brought about a paradigm shift in the way films about school violence focused their narratives”, which sounds incredibly delicious in a mind-stretching wanky sort of way.
Coop hopes to translate this son of a bitch into a book, and God love him I hope he does. Hit the jump a taste his analytical aspirations.
Karl Urban: “Conversations” totally happening about ‘DREDD’ sequel. DON’T FUGGIN TEASE ME BRO.
Karl Urban says that there could be a Dredd sequel. No shit! I mean yeah duh, there’s a Dredd sequel coming alright! It’s called The Raid 2! Ha! Get it? ‘Cause Dredd is basically a rip-off of the wondrous flick The Raid? Eh — who fucking cares. More than enough room in this fanboy heart for both.
Paul Thomas Anderson x Joaquin Phoenix jam ‘INHERENT VICE’ dropping in December
Oh word? P.T. Anderson and Joaquin Phoenix’s next uber-collab is dropping in December? Well a fucking Merry Christmas to me, too! Said uber-collab-jam is an adaptation of Thomas Pynchon’s Inherent Vice. Which I haven’t read. So yeah.
Sony: ‘SPIDER-MAN’ MOVIES EVERY YEAR! Me: LOLOKAY
In case you’re the last asshole upon a bastion of denial when it comes to Sony’s plans for Spider-Man, you may want to listen up. Some Big Wig Person of Importance has announced that there will be a “Spider-Man” movie every year. Now this totally translates into “we don’t own any cool Marvel properties, so we’re going to puff up the Arachnid Universe.”
‘GODZILLA’ OFFICIAL TRAILER: The LIZARD KING is s**ting on our livessss
Good God (of Lizards) with a side of fuck creme! Am I really going to dig this movie? If the cryptic and vague tea leaves that constitute an official trailer are to be believed (perhaps foolishly), the answer is an emphatic yes.
Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg helming CONSOLE WARS movie.
Outside of debating “Metallica or Megadeth?”, the biggest source of contention in my adolescence was what console was superior. Now as a spoiled douchebag, I always owned all of them. Thanks Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, and shitty teenager jobs! But it was furious!, fun!, meaningless, and now a couple of lads are bringing that clash to the screen.