#Movies
‘Breaking Bad’ director Michelle MacLaren developing and directing ‘Wonder Woman’
Well, shit! Here I was thinking that DC’s cinematic universe was cursed to be populated with intellectual effluent like Zack Snyder. But along comes Michelle MacLaren to direct Wonder Woman, giving me hope at least momentarily. Fuck yeah!
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‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ trailer debuting in nine f**king cinemas this weekend
Oh Disney. You shit-ass. Debuting the Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer in only nine Regal Cinemas. The closest one to me in NYC. Which means that if I want to see it, I’ll fittingly have to descend into the most Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy I can imagine. I’m hoping, like, as Riff pointed out to me in response to a frantic text, that maybe these are just the Regal cinemas that are playing it?
‘Jurassic World’ Teaser Trailer: Yo Dawg I Heard You Like Dinosaurs #TiredMeme
Ya’ll want a teaser trailer for the Jurassic World teaser trailer? #INCEPTIONHORN?!?! Well, you fucking got it.
‘The Stand’ director says it will be four movie mega event.
Generally I troll Stephen King because Bateman and Rendar have both admitted to me under chemical duress that they’ve masturbated into copies of The Dark Tower. But I’m going to be the straight-man here. And far be it for me to critique what people jerk-off into. The Stand seems cool, but I haven’t read it. So I don’t know how to react to this news.
Paul Greengrass adapting ‘1984’ for the movies
Why do we want to watch 1984? Ain’t it like we’re living this shit? None the less. Paul Greengrass will bring to us proles a movie about proles based on a book about proles and oppression and regression and societal dumbing-down and the surveillance state. Us proles will watch it, most won’t get, and those who do won’t use it to motivate them. Whatever.
GODDAMN YES: Chris Pratt starring in ‘Cowboy Ninja Viking’
Cowboy Ninja Viking was the short-lived but utterly fantastic comic by A.J. Lieberman and Riley Rossmo. Goddamn insane, with hypertextual, ultra-violence madness, it centered on a squad of assassins, spies, and killers with multiple personality disorders. Pratt is playing the lead Duncan, who yes, is a fucking Cowboy, Ninja, and Viking.
‘X-Men: Apocalypse’ Jean Grey Casting Rumors: Elle Fanning, Chloe Moretz, Hailee Steinfeld
Looks like we’re getting some fucking Jean Grey up in X-Men: Apocalypse. And to that I say fucking good! If I can’t get my goddamn Jean Grey proper in the comics (or maybe I can, truthfully I’ve fucking checked out of the X-Verse), at least give me the Baddest of Them All in cinematic form.
Daniel Bruhl joins ‘Captain America: Civil War’, prolly as villain.
Daniel Bruhl has gotten into the comic book movie game. As should be expected. It as a vortex, a vacuum, a black hole, this comic book movie industry. Sucking up all and any talented actors, shitting them out garbed in spandex, teflon, face mask. And fuck, as a fanboy, I’m stoked.
Justin Lin being courted for ‘Fast and Furious’ multi-part finale
Justin Lin is one of my favorite action directors. I’m not even kidding. I’M NOT EVEN TROLLING. So goddamn yes I’m glad he’s returning to the franchise he helped resurrect.
‘Avengers: Age of Ultron’ Trailer: We Are All Robot Apocalypse Puppets
I’m really excited for Avengers: Age of Ultron. This is despite the fact that Ultron is one giant Robotic Trope that has already been beaten into Vibranium and smeared across our pop culture face over and over again. But fuck! If it a trope that ain’t broke, don’t fix it? And this is one trope I love.
