It’s been a moment since I crept out from under the shadows and issued forth a Weekend Open Bar, huh? For that, I apologize. How the fuck are you doing, friends? Apologies for the tardiness, and all that happy horse shit. You know how it goes, or maybe you don’t know how it goes.

But, when the MalaiseVapors got your synapses in their claws, it’s hard to fight back.

But, I’m here now. The MalaiseVapors beat back, another row in the books. They’re gone, but not forgotten. They’re gone, but they’ll return. They always return, to dance the Dance Macabre.

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I don’t understand Oscar season.

As an anxiety-riddled, hyperventilating-mess, the glands in my brain-pipes often don’t work well enough for me to understand much. But I’m sure, even after a fresh dump, a jettisoned load, and my favorite strain of THC, I still wouldn’t understand Awards season.

I get watching a bunch of people sucking one another off. Covering each other in fluids and fantasy, moaning and churning against one another, hoping for the big finish to end up in their hands.

But, I still don’t understand Oscar season.

Or, maybe it’s that I understand Oscar season. And I hate it.

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Welcome to the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE!

What’s this weekly feature, you ask? Well, first I’m going to batter your brain with some drivel-fiction sci-fi nonsense. After that, I’m going to share some of the entertainment foodstuffs I’ll be devourin’ over the course of the week. Y’know, as a means of sustaining joy during the spirit-threatin’ workdays.

But wait! The best part is when everyone who isn’t me jumps into the comments section to share what they’ll be doing this week! So enough with the prelude, let’s go for it!

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Man, fuck the winter. I have always romanticized, and quite frankly enjoyed, the winter. But not this year, friends. Not this year at all. I can’t handle the barren HellScape this year. Whereas in past I rejoiced in scaling it with snowbeast in tow, this year it’s just a reminder of the fact that it isn’t May. But it’s not the physical hardships that have me ground down. I can do the cold and the snow.

It’s the emotional. More than usual, my brain-veins are struggling to pump. I can reason with the weather, but I can’t reason with the malaiseyonnaise struggling to course through the meat-electricity of my flesh-bag. So, I must confess I just haven’t been able the mental wherewithal to write this son of a bitch.

But, I’m here now! So, while whatever chemicals are sloshing around relatively favorably in my body, I shall let you know what I’m looking forward to this week. Or rather since it’s Wednesday, what I’m looking forward to, and what I’ve been enjoying.

This is Monday Morning Commute.

By way of Wednesday afternoon.

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It’s the Weekend! It’s the Weekend Open Bar!

Spend time with me this weekend!

I’m hammering out this opening salvo quickly, because, I must confess, I gotta scrub my ass. Birthday dinner is waiting! Stuff guts with Mexican food! Then, tonight, Wrestle Kingdom with Bateman is waiting! Stuff guts with pizza, with sugar, with glory, and with glee. But, friends. Don’t think I’m neglecting you! This very hammering out, this very textual blitzkrieg is evidence I care about you!

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Desktop Thursdays! Coming to you live from Hoth, or at least a place within the Empire proper that feels like it. Been a brutal week of weather here in Massachusetts. A collection of days reaching subzero temperatures, punctuated today by a good old fashion blizzard. But wait, there’s more! Tomorrow with the windchill we are going to be hitting -20. The most fucked up part? I dig this shit. Dig. It. So does the Lucy the Snowbeast, and so I imagine it’s only a matter of time before the two of us go romping and stomping around the neighborhood.

Anyways! Again! This is Desktop Thursdays. Wherein I give you little voyeurs a glimpse into my life. Real world, virtual world, textual. Then, by god, by the Gods, you share your own in the comments.

Without further ado!

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Back to life, friends. Back to reality. At least, for people like me who are fortunate enough to have spent the last week wallowing in excess and friendship. So I have returned to reality, and I’m currently sitting in a very quiet Writing Center, writing very quietly.

None the less.

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I’ve been suffering, indulging, and enjoying this past week. I’ve had it off from work, the first legitimate vacation from work since, well, I don’t know. Logically, I shouldn’t lament this fact. For, I know motherfuckers in this empathy-barren world work way more than me, and get no breaks. Emotionally, I’m so fucking stoked. However, I’m facing the typical fork in the road as vacation winds down. Do I just embrace the indulgence, the corpulence, the chemical-insanity for a few more days (I will). Or, do I begin to wind down the Caligulian existence, and prepare for reentry on Tuesday (I won’t)?

Whatever the case, let’s spend the waning days of DisasterYear2017 together, friends! Here in the Weekend Open Bar!

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A little streaming from Christmas evening. Playing some Super Mario World, tackling a five-pound bag of watermelon Sour Patch Kids. There’s, uh, other stuff, but I’m blanking on it. Totally compelling description, right?

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It’s another belated installment of Desktop Thursdays! Oh, you know the one! The one where I share glimpses into my life! Well, not all of it. Not the crusty underwear (usually), the callouses on my ass-rim (usually), or my destroyed toilet bowl rim (usually). Instead, looks at the family, the literal desktop, the figurative desktop, my animals, et cetera.

Then! As per usual, I ask you to share your own world in the comments section!

Without!

Fucking!

Further!

Ado!

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