Monday Morning Commute: A Fertile Heart Attack.

A Fertile Heart Attack

Absalom Fabliaux was halfway done with a breakthrough paragraph when he was interrupted.

“Haythaire, old man! Haythaire! Whatturya doing? Writing a poetry? An’ wireyou dranking Pepsi?”

Although Fabliaux found creative solace in the white-noise of this particular bar, he also knew that it was inevitably accompanied by crescendos of human detritus. Oily Three-Pieces clamoring about the day’s acquisitions. Stock Pirates tryin’ to sandbag tear-floods with shot glasses. Little Black Dresses guffawing their ways into Designer Pants, hoping to find wallets in the process. In this case, a Pie-Eyed Intern intrigued by the sight of an obviously out of place Miscreant drinkin’ Pepsi and punchin’ at a word-processor.

“Searsly, man, whillyu read me a poetry?”

In his younger and more vulnerable years, Absalom might’ve responded with a left hook. He’d had no patience for drunken curiosities. Many a tooth’d been spilled because of some errant remark to which offense’d been taken. This was, most likely, a symptom of the disease known as Self-Loathing, as Señor Fabliaux himself was once known as the most unabashedly drunken, incorrigibly inquisitive writers of his generation.

But with age comes patience, and there ain’t no doubt that Absalom Fabliaux was old as fuck.

“Son, I’m not writing a poem, I’m writing a novel.”

A vapid gaze spread into a smile. Pie-Eyed was excited. “A novel? Like a book?!”

“Exactly.”

“Oh shit! I usedta read books all the time, when I was a liddle kid…I haven’t even thoughta readin’ a book in years.”

Absalom took a hearty rip of refreshing cola. “Well, you should – there ain’t no goddamn experience like sittin’ down with a good book.”

Pie-Eyed’s head lolled from shoulder to shoulder in equal parts intoxication and amazement. This old bastard – who appeared more suited for dock-work or trash-disposal than word-crafting – had reminded him of a lost love. An affinity suppressed. A lust relegated to dreams.

Unprompted, Pie-Eyed leaned forward, tapped Absalom’s temple, and asked, “So, do ya got a good book in there?”

“I don’t know.” After a beat, the writer tapped his left breast, “But in here, I’ve got ex-wives and dead friends and missed opportunities. And there ain’t no ground more fertile for stories than this sort of heaviness.”

“Will…will you tell me about a dead friend?”

“You’re goddamn right I will. Barkeep! I need another Pepsi over here!”

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Welcome to the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! As the navigator of Spaceship OL, I’m goin’ to chart an itinerary through the Pop-Nonsense Territories. After you check out the destinations I’ll be steering us towards this week, it’s up to you to hit up the comments section — where’ll you be heading this week? Comic Book Station? The TV Armory? The Cinema Sand Dunes?

In other words, it’s a show-and-tell danceathon for the Digital Nerd Crew.

Let’s headspin!

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Re-Readin’ and Re-Readin’ and suggestin’ OLD CITY BLUES VOLUME 2 because it’s so goddamn wonderful.

Old City Blues vol 2.

Giannis Milonogiannis has proven that OLD CITY BLUES ain’t a goddamn fluke. The second collection of the webcomic picks up right where the last one left off, with the corporately-owned New Athens succumbing to its inherent corruption. Luckily, Solano and crew are still goin’ to do their goddamn best to salvage whatever humanity is hidden under the callused exterior of the dystopian landscape.

If you like sick action, mechs, car chases, uploaded consciousnesses, robo-prosthetics, cyberpunk, or comics, you need to read this book.

[OL interviewed MILONOGIANNIS]

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Drinkin’ MAD ELF ALE `cause I’m tryin’ to see mad elves.

Mad Elf Ale

Do you like craftbeer? Do you like beer with a fruity quality? Do you like holiday spirit? Do you like elevated ABV? Do you like to drink four beers and then believe you’re actually seeing elves!?

If you answered yes to any of the above, please seek out MAD ELF ALE from the mighty Troegs! You will not be disappointed.

For more details, read THIS REVIEW from the early days of OL!

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Gettin’ the pole from the crawlspace and celebratin’ FESTIVUS with the rest of us!

Festivus

Today is December 23rd — the date on which FESTIVUS is celebrated in The Strike.

In the last four days, I’ve watched this episode at least five times.

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Gettin’ all sorts of CHRISTMAS spirited!

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So that’s my week — comics and beer and television and entertaining ghosts that’ll remind me of my humanity!

What’re you up to this week?