Official Omega-Level Rebel Alliance Update: Kickstarter Is Actually a Part of the Evil Empire

Hello, Omega-Level Rebel Alliance.

Last week, I offered it up to you fine people here at OL whether or not it was a good idea to start a Kickstarter campaign to buy the Star Wars franchise to save the original trilogy, and the response was overwhelmingly positive. Not only did we decide that it was a most worthy venture, but there was simply no other realistic option; creating a Kickstarter in order to raise enough money to buy Star Wars from George Lucas was clearly the right thing to do.

So, building off your moral fortitude and love for artistic integrity, I set off to prepare the Kickstarter account. I did some research to see how one would go about getting the whole enterprise up and running and I quickly realized that the people behind Kickstarter have the ability to reject any proposal that comes their way and, judging by what they consider good proposals and creditable enterprises (that is, a ton of stupid shit), it became clear that they would certainly turn down this (literally) billion-dollar idea because they have no vision or genuine affinity for justice in this world. But I gave it a shot anyway, hoping my belief in the Force would guide my shot home; unfortunately, as you can see in the image below, I seem to be too good of a shot, because I hit some kind of nerve and they swiftly tried to shoot us down. And I was not going to allow it because I could see through their evil ruse.

(Click to Enlarge.)

Obviously, by denying our proposal, Kickstarter has revealed itself to be a terrible site that is run by people who are diligently working against us. And, in doing so, they are clearly working with/for George Lucas.

But now that we know what we are dealing with, what else can we do to get the word out about our Alliance against Lucas? What else can we do to save Star Wars?   Our journey may have taken an unforeseen, almost absurd turn, but I assure you this:   Our enthusiasm for Star Wars and our dedication to its preservation will not go unnoticed.   We will topple the Evil Empire that is George Lucas.