Wednesday – If You’re Mad At Kanye But You Cried Over Michael Jackson, You’re An Idiot.

The way everyone is going nuts about Kanye West you’d think he was caught molesting children.

Oh wait.

We don’t lash into child molesters, now do we? Well, I mean we do. But not ones that didn’t make a significant contribution to the pop industry, molest countless boys and bribe their parents, and perform surgery after surgery on themselves until they look like an unrecognizable monster from my dreams.

I’ve found the past week to be generally disappointing for a humanity I don’t have much faith in already. The pervasiveness of Kanyegate is staggering. It’s everywhere. Twitter updates. Facebook status updates. On the news. On the radio.

Who the fuck cares. Why the fuck cares! Who the fuck cares?

I find it particularly saddening that a dude crashes the stage of a shitty pop infomercial and it brings hell down upon him. Of course he acted like a goddamn schmuck. Is that really debatable? He apologizes a day later and it ain’t good enough. No way. No how.

Why?

Because you’re being told you’re supposed to be outraged. It’s a convenient little bit of fast-food pop-news to keep the fat docile populace from really thinking about anything worth fucking mentioning.

Then there’s Michael Jackson. A man commits a laundry list of sex crimes against little boys and he’s lauded as Pop Jesus. The way people cried and cried and oh-my-gosh-I-can’t-believe-he-died sentiment that was vomited across the walls of media was disgusting.

What the fuck is going on here? How is it that a guy who crashed the gate of a Shit Castle becomes a public enemy, while another pop-star can get away from having children fondle his nipples.

It’s insanity in motion.

People’s memories have become so tailored by the exertion of the media it’s absurd. Newscast after newscast told everyone, you’re supposed to be sad, Michael died! Oh my gosh Michael died! No, not Michael! The world’s only lost a child-molesting pill-popper! How are we ever going to cope? Who is going to cure AIDS? Who is going to solve cancer? Who is going to create the ultimate renewable energy?

More importantly, who is going to be a sexual threat to our children?

Oh, but Kanye! God damn that bastard! He was hammered and he acted like a fucking idiot! I mean, who can relate to that? Probably oh…only 90% of the people on Facebook who were “outraged” by his utterly despicable actions! Dudes and dudettes who post countless pictures of orange-skinned drunken disasters trying to take the moral high ground.

Maybe it was a bigger stage but you’ve all been there and you know it. It’s hilarious.

Sentiment is contagious and spreads around stupidity like intellectual Ebola. It doesn’t really matter if you feel a particular way; it just matters if you fall into line.

Well, uh, gee whiz, everyone is telling me the King of Pop dying is a catastrophe! I guess, I guess, well you know what, I do feel bad!

Fucking please.

Man! Everyone is mad at Kanye, yeah, what a fucking asshole!

Sincerity has gone the way of the dinosaur. It’s been replaced with a hive-mind mentality that we’ve always have, magnified to the zillionth degree because of all our social networking sites.

Please. If you felt any actual outrage at Kanye’s behavior you need a fucking life. You need to pick up a book, or start sewing, or I don’t know, watch some actual fucking news.

It’s almost as bad as discounting a fucking child molester because he wrote some jams back in 1973.

People’s ideas are just vomited up replications of other people’s ideas which are just vomited up replications of the slop they call news these days. It’s nothing new, I suppose. And I doubly suppose I’m not immune to it myself. But watching the proliferation of insincere sentiment is staggering.

If the media wants you to think Kanye is a monster you probably will, and if the media wants you to sing and dance all the way to forgetting that Michael Jackson was a pedophile I suppose you will too.

Shhh, don’t be disrespectful about Michael! Don’t begrudge the dead!

You don’t really care that Michael Jackson is dead. He was just some asshole whose songs you sing at karaoke. You’re not really upset with Kanye West. The dude is just another douchebag in a long line of douchebags. No one flipped out when the Beastie Boys stormed the stage.

But what is the fucking alternative, right? Let’s not think about the healthcare debate. Let’s ignore the wars in Afghanistan and the drone bombing in Pakistan. Let’s not focus on a zillion other things on this rotting rock. Because CNN plays the clips of Kanye West, and because Entertainment Weekly honors Michael Jackson.

And because we’d much rather be comfortable than have to make the decisions for ourselves.